I always got pretty worried when adults kept saying that school was the good times growing up, as I didn’t have a particularly good time, and was not onboard for it being downhill from there.
Luckily I’ve learned that it’s not actually universally applicable, my life has definitely just gotten better as I’ve gotten older.
It’s way better in some ways - especially if you find a good career in a field you’re passionate about.
But some of the responsibilities of adulthood are a burden that is hard to appreciate until you’re there. And the perspective gained by life experience is also very different, for better or worse.
For instance, I went through a breakup last year at 39 with someone I was fully expecting to marry. It was my first major relationship failure in decades, and as I was being dumped I expected it to crush me.
What ended up hurting the most was that it didn’t hurt that much. I didn’t spiral into depression or fall apart at work. I wasn’t happy about it, but I was fine. A younger me would have been overwhelmed by the emotional toll, but the adult me was able to keep moving forward without breaking stride.
And in a way that’s what hurts. The passion of youth has been tempered by a lifetime of experience that puts everything into perspective.
Ugh, as you get older, everything just starts to dull. Things are less important, less passionate, and more “meh” in general. And not in a depressed way, but more specifically that I’ve been there, done that for most emotions I could have.
I will say that now that I have an infant daughter, I’m finding those passionate emotions again and I’m excited as she’s excited and sad when she’s sad. That is the great part about parenting.
They’re the good times because you see you had no responsibilities and endless potential to be so many things, which becomes less and less true as you age. Of course, it’s miserable too not knowing what you are/what to do and feeling lost because you have no responsibilities, so it’s really just a grass is greener thing I imagine.
Yeah I think it is a greener grass situation. Sure you may have no responsibilities, but you also have less freedom in school. You can’t live on your own, can’t drink or gamble or vote or anything like that, can’t go where you want, etc. There’s always a trade-off.
For me, school was a shithole that I was glad it was over, those were not the good years. Things are not perfect, but they have gotten radically better ever since.
The only thing about school that was good is that I made a few very good friends. Those are probably going to be life long friendships.
I just started my internship, and I have to say, it is so good not to have to worry about exams, projects and so on aftera full day of school and on weekends. When I close the lid of the laptop, the day is over. Plus I get smaller days, from 9 to 5 instead of from 8 to 5/6. I have never had as much free time
Not trying to downplay your experience, but uni was actually so much better for me… being able to focus on things that actually coincide with my interests and abilities in Uni was so liberating after being forced to go through five classes a day five days a week, most of which were either insultingly idiotic or existentially difficult… Not to mention having an actually human-paced schedule with ample time to plan ahead instead of constantly being in damage reduction mode. I remember thinking to myself in the first year of uni: “Is this what normal life is supposed to feel like?” I’m still recovering from school emotionally, but the fact that I finally have the mental space to recover is definitely a good sign. I guess you and I just have way different schools, universities, and personal circumstances!
And then you get out of school and realise that those were the good times.
I always got pretty worried when adults kept saying that school was the good times growing up, as I didn’t have a particularly good time, and was not onboard for it being downhill from there.
Luckily I’ve learned that it’s not actually universally applicable, my life has definitely just gotten better as I’ve gotten older.
It’s different.
It’s way better in some ways - especially if you find a good career in a field you’re passionate about.
But some of the responsibilities of adulthood are a burden that is hard to appreciate until you’re there. And the perspective gained by life experience is also very different, for better or worse.
For instance, I went through a breakup last year at 39 with someone I was fully expecting to marry. It was my first major relationship failure in decades, and as I was being dumped I expected it to crush me.
What ended up hurting the most was that it didn’t hurt that much. I didn’t spiral into depression or fall apart at work. I wasn’t happy about it, but I was fine. A younger me would have been overwhelmed by the emotional toll, but the adult me was able to keep moving forward without breaking stride.
And in a way that’s what hurts. The passion of youth has been tempered by a lifetime of experience that puts everything into perspective.
Ugh, as you get older, everything just starts to dull. Things are less important, less passionate, and more “meh” in general. And not in a depressed way, but more specifically that I’ve been there, done that for most emotions I could have.
I will say that now that I have an infant daughter, I’m finding those passionate emotions again and I’m excited as she’s excited and sad when she’s sad. That is the great part about parenting.
Ok, yes, I felt that.
21, and I am feeling this already.
They’re the good times because you see you had no responsibilities and endless potential to be so many things, which becomes less and less true as you age. Of course, it’s miserable too not knowing what you are/what to do and feeling lost because you have no responsibilities, so it’s really just a grass is greener thing I imagine.
Yeah I think it is a greener grass situation. Sure you may have no responsibilities, but you also have less freedom in school. You can’t live on your own, can’t drink or gamble or vote or anything like that, can’t go where you want, etc. There’s always a trade-off.
I hated being a kid because no one took anything I had to say seriously — drove me crazy
For me, school was a shithole that I was glad it was over, those were not the good years. Things are not perfect, but they have gotten radically better ever since.
The only thing about school that was good is that I made a few very good friends. Those are probably going to be life long friendships.
I just started my internship, and I have to say, it is so good not to have to worry about exams, projects and so on aftera full day of school and on weekends. When I close the lid of the laptop, the day is over. Plus I get smaller days, from 9 to 5 instead of from 8 to 5/6. I have never had as much free time
Your school day was 8 to 6? Damn. That definitely doesn’t sound normal.
Not every day was the same, some were 9 to 6, some 8 to 4, some 8 to 5, but 8 to 6 is not a rare occurrence
Not trying to downplay your experience, but uni was actually so much better for me… being able to focus on things that actually coincide with my interests and abilities in Uni was so liberating after being forced to go through five classes a day five days a week, most of which were either insultingly idiotic or existentially difficult… Not to mention having an actually human-paced schedule with ample time to plan ahead instead of constantly being in damage reduction mode. I remember thinking to myself in the first year of uni: “Is this what normal life is supposed to feel like?” I’m still recovering from school emotionally, but the fact that I finally have the mental space to recover is definitely a good sign. I guess you and I just have way different schools, universities, and personal circumstances!