This website contains age-restricted materials including nudity and explicit depictions of sexual activity.
By entering, you affirm that you are at least 18 years of age or the age of majority in the jurisdiction you are accessing the website from and you consent to viewing sexually explicit content.
My mother told me a story one time, about one of her younger cousins and his epic interaction with a bunch of cheap flip-flops/sandals.
He was somewhere between the age when his incisors had grown in, but not yet old enough to speak…or, well, to not be immensely fucking stupid. A bunch of people in the extended family were visiting his family’s house, and they had all left their flip-flops in the front room. These were the oldschool foam-rubber type of flip-flop sandals. The ones that were just a brightly-colored, entirely flat foam-rubber, foot-shaped sole, and a little plastic piece to hold it onto your foot. Everyone in the family apparently had a different color of shoes.
When everyone was preparing to leave the house, they found that EVERY PAIR OF SHOES had a toddler’s-mouth-sized bite taken out of it. Just one per pair. This little shit had tried every “flavor” of shoe, and apparently didn’t figure out they were all rubber-and-foot flavored until he’d tried all of them.
If I remember correctly, he had sampled at least eight or ten people’s shoes.
That is both the dumbest and the funniest thing I’ve read all day
I know, right? I hadn’t thought about that story in so many years, but it popped right back into my brain, the instant I saw this meme.
I went through the bite-everything stage to, but I think I prefered to bite people lol. My Mum says I stopped when one time I snuck up and bit her and she slapped-- not because she wanted to slap me, but because that was her automatic reaction to suddenly being bitten.
My babies love biting toes. I keep trying to warn them they’re gonna get reflexively kicked one of these times.
That’s just called priming your immune system
Antibodies: “Got another flip flop. My guy oops ain’t getting footwear-itis today”