So, I recently discovered that 2 of the women I’ve been interested in have the same “preference” which is to say they like a domineering partner. One is a member of the DDLG community and the other has a partner outside of their spouse who is “in-charge” of their sex life. I suppose my question not to put anyone down or kink shame is are there signifiers that I’m missing? I typically enjoy being helpful in a relationship which trends me toward wanting a dominant partner but my stupid junk seems to only pick people in my situation. Please advise.
I think you mean to say that you’re interested in finding a dominant partner, and you’d like to know if there are any signs to look out for to find one? Let me know if I’m misunderstanding, but otherwise-- no, not really. A site like Fetlife might fit your needs, where local people will present themselves in a kink-forward way, so you can just see ahead of time who’s into what you’re interested in
One caveat regarding Fetlife, as someone who’s part of my local BDSM community on there, it doesn’t bill itself as a dating site or hookup site. Though that does happen there, if you start messaging a bunch of women like its a dating site you’re likely not going to succeed. Instead, participate in your local groups and build connections and friendships. Of all sexes. The more you are involved the more people you’ll meet and the more likely you’ll find what you’re looking for.