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    1 year ago

    Padeira de Aljubarrota killed 7 Castillians by cooking them in her bakery’s oven in 1385.

    Brites de Almeida das born in 1350 with 6 fingers in each hand, a though lady, could easily kill a man with her hands (and did it a few times), was kidnapped and enslaved in Northern Africa, managed to escape with her bare hands, helped out 2 other Portuguese guys to escape, stole a boat, sailed back with the guys, had a prob with one of them, killed him. Tried to establish herself in a honest way, but crime and murder were always coming her way somehow, ended up moving towns and disguise herself as a man. Met and older lady friend, a baker, that wanted to maker her an honest person. They lived happily as a couple. Older lady dies, she inherits the bakery. Castille tries to occupy Portugal, big battle, Portugal is outnumbered but manages to have a spectacular win. Some castillans are running around and looting. She lures 7 into her bakery, cooks them alive in her oven. Forever a national hero and legend.

    Nothing of this is proven, including the Castillans she killed (which is the factoid that made her a hero) but there’re even songs about her and whenever Portugal plays against Spain in football you’ll see some people dressed as a baker on the stadium.

    A lesbian serial-killer who escapsed enslavement to kill Castillans in one of the most important battles of our history? To me nothing can be truer than this, independently of what you can prove or not.