They’re baby pictures. We’re not talking about something erotic here. Naked babies are not some sort of scandalous thing. In most cultures, they’re normal.
We’re not talking about social media, we’re talking about the significant other of my child. Or even relatives. I didn’t get my daughter’s permission to take her photo when she was a baby, so I shouldn’t have sent a photo to my father on the other side of the country based on this reasoning.
used to torture children in front of their serious romantic partners brought home for the first time.
Things were different when we were kids. It’s a fucked up thing to psychologically abuse your (presumably) teenage kids like that and objectively people know that. (Your daughters) consent in the subject is the only thing that matters. The only reason anyone is giving you a pass is because you’re FlyingSquid, but maybe leave those pictures in the closet until closer to the wedding.
Oh please. It’s not psychological abuse. It’s “torture” the same way telling the story about the time they told a lady in the checkout line, “I came out of my mommy’s bagina!” when they were three to an adult child’s partner is torture.
You show me an example of anyone suffering PTSD because their parents showed their partner baby pictures.
Yeah saving it for their long term partners (if you have to) is probably a better idea than showing them during the first meeting.
And please don’t dismiss other peoples trauma because you didn’t experience it personally, childhood trauma takes many different forms, some we’re only just becoming aware of.
I didn’t dismiss anyone’s trauma, I’m asking if that has ever resulted in anyone’s trauma, a parent showing their adult child’s partner a picture of them naked as a baby.
I mean if nothing else, not as a “torture,” showing the partner the first couple of pictures of the kid as a baby should be acceptable to people just as a “this is what they looked like when it all began” and they don’t come out with clothes on. They also are unable to understand the concept of consent, let alone give it.
I would also suggest that if that did cause someone trauma, it would be because the parent was aware this sort of thing would upset their child to that level and did it anyway. I think most parents wouldn’t actually show the pictures if they knew it would cause the child real psychological pain, because that isn’t the point in doing it. It’s usually a form of good-natured ribbing, not malicious.
You claiming that it would give you PTSD is not evidence that anyone has suffered or is suffering from PTSD because of it. That’s just you making an assumption about a situation you’ve apparently never actually faced.
I might note here as a Finn that this prudishness concerning the naked human body seems very American.
You’re not allowed to go to a public sauna in your swimming wear here. And if you’re a dad and have a small daughter, you’re obviously going to have her in the men’s changing room. And when I was a kid, I was in the women’s changing room with my mom.
Even at parties it’s not uncommon to have a mixed-gender sauna where everyone is naked. I’d say most commonly it’s women wearing a towel and men wearing nothing, or if it’s in a sauna near a beach/lake then people will have their swimwear on most times.
Still, just being naked isn’t considered sexual in any way. You can even see the non-sexual nature for about 50% of the people who are naked. (Vis-a-vis their lack of visible arousal.)
I was so confused by their comment that I totally misread it. Not only are they saying that most people wouldn’t change a baby’s diaper in public, but that it isn’t necessary sometimes. Like there’s always a place to do it discreetly when they’ve just had an explosion?
Taking photos of naked children isn’t, and shouldn’t, be normal in any culture I’m familiar with, and you definitely shouldn’t be showing them to anyone.
They’re baby pictures. We’re not talking about something erotic here. Naked babies are not some sort of scandalous thing. In most cultures, they’re normal.
Removed by mod
Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.
I’m not embarrassed by my body and if that’s what her partner really wants to see, I don’t care.
This is actually solid advice, especially as far as social media is concerned.
We’re not talking about social media, we’re talking about the significant other of my child. Or even relatives. I didn’t get my daughter’s permission to take her photo when she was a baby, so I shouldn’t have sent a photo to my father on the other side of the country based on this reasoning.
You’re (wisely) backpeddling now but you said:
Things were different when we were kids. It’s a fucked up thing to psychologically abuse your (presumably) teenage kids like that and objectively people know that. (Your daughters) consent in the subject is the only thing that matters. The only reason anyone is giving you a pass is because you’re FlyingSquid, but maybe leave those pictures in the closet until closer to the wedding.
Oh please. It’s not psychological abuse. It’s “torture” the same way telling the story about the time they told a lady in the checkout line, “I came out of my mommy’s bagina!” when they were three to an adult child’s partner is torture.
You show me an example of anyone suffering PTSD because their parents showed their partner baby pictures.
Ah yes, because everything is ethical as long as the other party doesn’t develop a mental illness because of it
The claim was it caused trauma. That is something that is evidence-based. You are changing the subject.
Yeah saving it for their long term partners (if you have to) is probably a better idea than showing them during the first meeting.
And please don’t dismiss other peoples trauma because you didn’t experience it personally, childhood trauma takes many different forms, some we’re only just becoming aware of.
I didn’t dismiss anyone’s trauma, I’m asking if that has ever resulted in anyone’s trauma, a parent showing their adult child’s partner a picture of them naked as a baby.
I mean if nothing else, not as a “torture,” showing the partner the first couple of pictures of the kid as a baby should be acceptable to people just as a “this is what they looked like when it all began” and they don’t come out with clothes on. They also are unable to understand the concept of consent, let alone give it.
I would also suggest that if that did cause someone trauma, it would be because the parent was aware this sort of thing would upset their child to that level and did it anyway. I think most parents wouldn’t actually show the pictures if they knew it would cause the child real psychological pain, because that isn’t the point in doing it. It’s usually a form of good-natured ribbing, not malicious.
Removed by mod
You claiming that it would give you PTSD is not evidence that anyone has suffered or is suffering from PTSD because of it. That’s just you making an assumption about a situation you’ve apparently never actually faced.
Removed by mod
I’ve said the same thing myself in other replies to them, it’s incredibly slimy how hard they’re trying to justify this.
Definitely wouldn’t leave them alone around children.
Removed by mod
How exactly do you think someone changes a diaper at a park?
Removed by mod
So you acknowledge that I would, in fact, expose my child naked in public. And with good reason. And everyone could see her genitalia when I did.
Edit: Oh, sorry, misread. You think you can always make it to a bathroom? You have never had a baby.
I might note here as a Finn that this prudishness concerning the naked human body seems very American.
You’re not allowed to go to a public sauna in your swimming wear here. And if you’re a dad and have a small daughter, you’re obviously going to have her in the men’s changing room. And when I was a kid, I was in the women’s changing room with my mom.
Even at parties it’s not uncommon to have a mixed-gender sauna where everyone is naked. I’d say most commonly it’s women wearing a towel and men wearing nothing, or if it’s in a sauna near a beach/lake then people will have their swimwear on most times.
Still, just being naked isn’t considered sexual in any way. You can even see the non-sexual nature for about 50% of the people who are naked. (Vis-a-vis their lack of visible arousal.)
I was so confused by their comment that I totally misread it. Not only are they saying that most people wouldn’t change a baby’s diaper in public, but that it isn’t necessary sometimes. Like there’s always a place to do it discreetly when they’ve just had an explosion?
Removed by mod
It’s rude to change a baby’s diaper in public?
Is it rude to breast feed in public as well?
You have not ever had a baby if you think you can get to a bathroom or a car every time before an emergency happens.
And you not knowing what it’s like to take care of a baby explains a lot.
Removed by mod
People or the significant other of my child?
Taking photos of naked children isn’t, and shouldn’t, be normal in any culture I’m familiar with, and you definitely shouldn’t be showing them to anyone.
Well you should get familiar with Finnish culture and then start berating the Finnish guy who chimed in and said it was totally normal.
You know what an immoral, shithole country Finland is though.
The Finns regularly take naked photos of their children? Sure buddy.
It’s not my fault that you reply to all of my comments and don’t bother reading other people’s. It’s right there for you to read.
When are you going to contact lemmy.world admin to have me reported to the authorities for child abuse and the possession of child pornography?
Removed by mod
you really need to chill out