I think the best part is that he asked almost like he was making a doctor’s appointment lol “are you available at 3pm on Thursday for some dehumanizing unprotected sex with a smelly neckbeard? No? Would Friday work better?”
Although it was in person instead of text, I did hook up with someone I knew from highschool with basically the same direct approach. It helped that I knew she would find it funny.
Plot twist: she has difficulty with reading comprehension and understanding modern slang. She actually would have been interested in casual unprotected sex with him. But anon stopped reading and didn’t clarify himself.
Alternate plot twist: she really loves horseback riding and always wanted to try riding a horse without a saddle (i.e. “bare back”) but was a little nervous and wanted someone to help her with it. One day, she told herself, she would find the right person to “bareback” with.
Then anon DMs her. “Yes,” she says, “I will bareback with you! meet me at the horse ranch.”
Anon’s like “horse ranch? wtf” but goes for it. The fated hour arrives and anon rolls with it. they all live happily ever after.
Good start
hmm
aaaand derailed
Hell, even “are you down…” isn’t bad. Suggested finishers:
Basically anything but that.
Damnit now I wanna smash
Sad ooh-ah-ah-ah-ah
you don’t even get to finish the last ah before she weds you
What about
Who knows? Maybe she’s down…
… to remove kebab
I hate that I’m doing this but the history need within me can’t let this one be
It’s the republic not the empire
Sorry I’ll leave now
Save some women for the rest of us, sheesh
If she says yes to the Skaven it’s your duty as a proud Dawi to crush her skull lest she infiltrates the clan.
Dude, if she says yes to building a skaven army, you wife her immediately.
Trust me, I did.
That’s a grudgin
Then we’re back to “Wanna smash?”
"Are you down…:
What a shame — I kinda love it
You need to sweeten the pot with calzones if you expect anyone to play cones of dunshire as a first date.
He could have just copy pasted these bullet points
I think the best part is that he asked almost like he was making a doctor’s appointment lol “are you available at 3pm on Thursday for some dehumanizing unprotected sex with a smelly neckbeard? No? Would Friday work better?”
Well, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take…
You miss 100% of the shots you DO take if your shots are all thrown as hard as possible in the opposite direction of the basket…
Nah, it might bounce off something and back into the basket. :) Extremely unlikely, but there’s a chance!
…unless?
Although it was in person instead of text, I did hook up with someone I knew from highschool with basically the same direct approach. It helped that I knew she would find it funny.
There were so many plot twists to this one, lol.
Plot twist: she has difficulty with reading comprehension and understanding modern slang. She actually would have been interested in casual unprotected sex with him. But anon stopped reading and didn’t clarify himself.
Alternate plot twist: she really loves horseback riding and always wanted to try riding a horse without a saddle (i.e. “bare back”) but was a little nervous and wanted someone to help her with it. One day, she told herself, she would find the right person to “bareback” with.
Then anon DMs her. “Yes,” she says, “I will bareback with you! meet me at the horse ranch.”
Anon’s like “horse ranch? wtf” but goes for it. The fated hour arrives and anon rolls with it. they all live happily ever after.
Not sure I can believe any of the text because anon wasn’t immediately told to stay the fuck away or worse, and blocked.
She doesnt need to know the exact meaning, “I’m into you and want to do x with/to you” is clear enough that anon has romantic or sexual intent.
That anon got a not utterly revolted response to that hailmary is more an indication that the interest is mutual than not I’d say