• @[email protected]
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        34 months ago

        I heard that at Jessica’s party, while everyone was playing 7 Minutes in Heaven, we were making out in her mom’s car and that our mustaches got tangled.

        I also heard that we put gerbils in each other’s butts, which is ridiculous since we only used hamsters.

        • @[email protected]
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          34 months ago

          I keep my mustache far too short for them to have tangled. They’ll have to do better than that!

          I do have to say that yours is nice and soft though. Do you condition it?

            • @[email protected]
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              34 months ago

              I’m going to start using mayonnaise treatments on my mustache, but I need a shower all the time. I guess I can get a mustache hairnet and line it with plastic wrap.

              That’s why you always smell so delicious!

              • @[email protected]
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                34 months ago

                Hairnet Mayonnaise Sack

                Look out Butthole Surfers, there’s a new band willing to give Texans a bad name!

                • @[email protected]
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                  34 months ago

                  Joke all you like, I’ve got a band gig this weekend with some guys as strange as I am. The band name may change.

                  But we’re a bunch of middle aged rockers so I’m not sure we’ll be out there giving the whole state a bad name. Probably just Spring.

                  • @[email protected]
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                    34 months ago

                    Spring??? Don’t worry, Spring doesn’t need any of your help to give it a bad name.

                    If Houston is Zac Efron, Spring is that intense stare he does in interviews that makes you wonder if he’s high or contemplating murder