geteilt von: https://lemmy.world/post/18499026
“In the entire dataset, 29% of men said they never approached a woman in person before. 27% said it had been more than one year. This was larger for men in the age 18-25 group: 45% had never approached a woman in person,” according to the study.
A majority of single males surveyed reported fear as the main reason they do not approach women for dates in person. Fear of rejection and fear of social consequences were the two most common responses.
The data highlights a growing concern in the United States and abroad — loneliness. A 2023 report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services found that almost half of U.S. adults report “measurable levels of loneliness.”
It’s interesting to say the least. It seems as though the social repercussions and rejection are the most profound reason. While the fear of rejection is easy enough to digest. But I think the fear or social consequences is a relatively new construct.
From what I understand it’s the fear of being viewed as a creep to approach a woman out of the blue. Which to me, is reasonable enough. But I don’t think I have ever heard my old man or anyone of his generation bringing this to the table.
Yet I do remember asking my friends about picking up hints and whether or not men are really that bad at it. And most them saying the just don’t want to risk misinterpreting it.
Perhaps there is an argument to be made that approaching women like this, has fallen out of social fashion. What do you guys think?
p.s. I hope this is casual enough of a conversation. I kinda screwed up my last one, I admit.
For reference, I’m in my early 30s. A random guy trying to ask me out would probably be a no-go, just for the fact that I don’t even know you. Probably because I’m kind of sheltered and don’t tend to strike up conversations with strangers. Maybe if we were at coffee/book/record shop or something and had a nice conversation first (so that I could at least gauge if he’s a weirdo or not), and THEN he asks me out.
Actually all of the people I’ve dated were people in my friend circle, friends of friends, people I went to school with, or coworkers. This kind of proximity dating has been enough for me since I’ve never felt… romantically lonely (I’m not gonna count highschool lol). I’ve never done online-dating because I’ve never felt the need to.
Basically I’m saying the random approach would probably, most likely, not work for someone like me.😅
I also think we’ve all heard plenty of dates-gone-wrong type of stories – and you hear a lot because the world’s very connected now and we love to share. And so that certainly makes a person more guarded, wary.
I wonder what the older generation’s dating experience was like. I’d like to think they were more outgoing and trusting and had an easier time! xD