However a lot of people are saying. Strong people, tough people. And they are saying very strongly. Lots of people. I don’t know, but a lot of people are saying it.
The best thing about it is that nobody actually believes it’s a real story. But it’s a great joke, because it just fits him so well. And the joke isn’t just that he would romance a loveseat, but that he might write about it without an ounce of self-awareness. The dude is not just awkward as fuck, but in a sinister sort of way. You could easily believe that if you left him alone with your own sofa, he might do unspeakable things.
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As Stephen Colbert gleefully said of the couch story last week, “It’s not true, and nobody cares.”
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Do you think anyone out there is trying it, American Pie-like? With a greasy rubber glove stuck to their junk?
Because that would be pretty great, too.
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“You know what? I can’t believe some lib thought of this first, because this is great.”
I loved Seth Meyers’ first joke about it when he came back off break (which is when Trump picked Vance):
“It’s NOT TRUE that JD Vance had sex with a couch. It is JUST A RUMOR!”
…
…
“It was just hand stuff.”
However a lot of people are saying. Strong people, tough people. And they are saying very strongly. Lots of people. I don’t know, but a lot of people are saying it.
The best thing about it is that nobody actually believes it’s a real story. But it’s a great joke, because it just fits him so well. And the joke isn’t just that he would romance a loveseat, but that he might write about it without an ounce of self-awareness. The dude is not just awkward as fuck, but in a sinister sort of way. You could easily believe that if you left him alone with your own sofa, he might do unspeakable things.
I dunno man, I believe it’s true.