Nobody likes people not accepting responsibility for their own actions. Duh.

At the same time, who am I to say that something isn’t or wasn’t as hard on someone as they say? Shouldn’t we believe people when they say a thing is a burden for them? Doubly so if we ourselves don’t have first-hand knowledge of it, such as poverty, or race, or gender?

Yes, I have a close friend who sometimes irritates me by how she keeps saying she can’t do X because Y, or failed at Z due to Q, but in the end her feelings are true and valid even if they seem irrational to me. And she’s so much more than that.