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The original was posted on /r/relationships by /u/BornRaspberry4598 on 2023-08-18 19:59:16+00:00.

I (27M) have been with my girlfriend (24F) for about 5 years. We met when I just got hired for the company I’m still employed for,she was an intern at the time and she was job shadowing my boss at the time we eventually hit it off and became BF and GF. One year later she got pregnant with our son. She later quit her internship and left college because at the time I was making decent money for myself, so no biggie I would go to work providing for my family while she would take care of our kid and essentially become a housewife. She would occasionally hangout with friends and well you guessed it a lot of guys would hit on her and who would blame them my girlfriend is very attractive she has a cute face and a nice fit body even after birthing a child, sometimes I even wonder how I even got her since I’m rather kinda over weight myself. However my girlfriend believes in loyalty so I thought I had nothing to worry about.

I really thought I had it all,a well paying job a beautiful girlfriend and a healthy baby boy! But after around 3 years ago I noticed my girlfriend was going out more and more to clubs with friends I didn’t mind that, after all our son has autism and can be quite difficult. So I don’t mind her going out and having a good time with friends. she would come home the day after and leaving me in the dark when I would text her friends or call them they would give me the typical answer like oh she’s fine and she’s sleeping on the couch right now. So I would not think much of it until very recently, even her friends were ghosting or giving me none answers. I started to really questioned my GF but she would reassure me that she loves me and would never cheat on me. But a week ago my girlfriend came home at 3:30. I was still awake because finally my son went to bed which can be very difficult since he is low functioning autistic and requires 100% support. But finally I had got him to go to sleep after watching his favorite movies, anyways so I’m chilling and trying to decompress and my girlfriend comes home and well her makeup is a mess her dress looks sloppily put on, she’s missing a heel and she’s balling her eyes out. I immediately think she was assaulted. I comforter and ask her who did this to you And that I’m here for her to cry on and that I love her. She immediately starts crying historically, she sits down and tells me that she wasn’t assaulted at all and actually she was having a one night stand with someone else

I’m in disbelief how can the most nicest girl do something so messed up to me. it doesn’t make sense at all my girlfriend is one of those one of a kind type of gal, she’s down to earth, and is very quirky basically everything I like in a woman. She’s apologetic and that the guilt was so over whelming that she had to come over after she did him. Guess she had Post nut clarity and got tf out of there because of the guilt. She started saying how sorry she is again and she isn’t blaming anyone but herself and she is willing to Do anything she can to gain my trust. She then pleads with me to forgive her and at this point I’m full blown ugly crying at this point and just don’t really have the urge to talk to her now I am in disbelief I simply cannot believe my girlfriend would cheat on me I tell her that I’m just gonna go to bed, so I do . I wake up and my girlfriend is in the kitchen with my son feeding him and trying to teach him how to speak since he isn’t speaking. Anyways, she sees me and with a sad look in her face she gives me a hey. I don’t say a thing instead I make myself some cup of coffee and play video games. After a couple of hours she approaches me asking me if we can talk and I reply with talk about what you cheated and my heart hurts. She starts crying and cuddling me saying it meant nothing to her and that she regrets it and she was thinking of me the whole time. This made me even more sad I told her that her thinking about me while hooking up with a guy makes me feel worse. She promises that she loves me and wants to prove it she tells me that I’m her everything and she just wants me and her to be together and is willing to do anything to keep this relationship alive. I then tell her I want you to be fully transparent with me. She agrees I asked her is this the first time she has cheated on me, there’s a slight pause she then looks down more tears flow down her face and there the answer is right in front of my face. I’m stunned, I loose it I start yelling at her saying how could you I’m balling my eyes out. I calm down and ask her how long has this been going on and well she’s been cheating on me you guessed it 3 years my heart sinks. I ask her why and all she could say is I don’t know. I then look at her not knowing what to say. And start packing my shit she start crying like a baby getting on her hands and knees begging for forgiveness pleading for me to stay however I just reply looking at her seeing you just hurts me at this point our son is crying as well scream at the top of his lungs my GF stops what she’s doing and completely tries to calm him down, this is my ticket to finish packing and leave, I also text a close friends of mine to go and crash at his place. After that I start to leave and Ima bout to exist my place my gf is holding our son in complete tears begging me to stay I tell her I can’t do that, she then asks me to call her and try to fix our relationship. I simple just say goodbye to our son and just leave.I make sure to call her mom and let her know the situation and that she should really be with her daughter the mom completely understands and that she had raised her daughter to be better than that.anyways I go to my buddies and honestly past few days have been Really stressful but relaxing . She has not stop been blowing up my phone asking me to come back and the she’s sorry and is a piece of she for cheating on me and will forever live with that guilt for the rest of her life but she wants to be with me and fix our relationship. I have been chilling with my buddy Since high school And his wife And honestly it’s been nice, but really miss my family.

I still love my GF and A part of me believes she can change but she cheated on me with multiple of guys and totally shattered what little confidence I had for myself and also trust I had for her. But in no way will I ever call her a bad mother. Because she’s not, she’s Actually perfect she’s raised our son who is severely Autistic and all though I love him can be very stressful but she has never complained about it since her love for our son is much greater than anything she has ever loved. He completely has separation anxiety since he’s so attached to my GF. She is the ideal mother to my kid but the fact that she cheated on me is heart shattering I’m at a cross roads Now. Do I forgive my Girlfriend and try to move past it or do I completely break up with her and date someone who is loyal to a fault and will love me and not cheat on me,I’m desperate for help !

TL;DR: my girlfriend of five years has been cheating on me for 3 years and I don’t know if I should leave or stay since we have a son together, and I still am very deeply in love with her. help!