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A lot of the comic’s statistics were height differences and that’s where you argument falls apart.
All presidents have a ‘height’ measurement, so we can make a probability distribution and look at the likelihood of an incumbent winning based on their height.
https://fisher.osu.edu/blogs/leadreadtoday/blog/does-height-make-right-u-s-presidents-and-their-height-weight-and-greatness
And because its continuous, we can extend that to Presidents whose heights haven’t previously been observed.