Haters, assemble!!!

Jokes aside, I want to know what drives you to inform the rest of a website, chat, forum, or thread, that you don’t like/enjoy/want/do something.

I wanna hear what your impetus is.

Is the act cathartic? Do you have a personal, negative experience with the thing you’re complaining about? Is the impulse automatic or do you think about it every time?

The question is only as serious as you make it, but I’m curious all the same.

  • Ogmios
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    314 months ago

    I think you’re over thinking it, frankly. In an ordinary discourse, sometimes ‘negative’ points will arise, and if you aren’t specifically averse to addressing such points then there’s no specific reason to avoid it.

    Essentially, there are a great many people who don’t even consider such issues the same way that you do.

    • @[email protected]
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      134 months ago

      This needs to be pinned as part of the mod rules. Criticism is not personal attack but the idea that it is infests Lemmy to its detriment

      • Ænima
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        74 months ago

        Not just Lemmy, but discourse overall, anymore.

        • @[email protected]
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          24 months ago

          Absolutely. As a manager, I deal with this at work with my team. The amount of times I have to explain that criticism can be constructive to help them is amazing. Our culture is so soft.

  • @[email protected]
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    314 months ago

    You seem to say it as if being negative is the goal. I don’t set out to leave a negative opinion, I just want to give my opinion. Sometimes, my opinion is negative. That’s just as valid as if my opinion was positive.

  • @[email protected]
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    144 months ago

    If someone is asking for opinions or there’s a general discussion then surely negative opinions are just as valid as positive ones

  • @[email protected]
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    124 months ago

    What do you mean by negative? In the sense that the response is insulting, or a personal attack? Generally, well adjusted people on forums websites try to avoid those, those who don’t are just assholes.

    But if you mean negative as in the reply merely disagrees with your point of view, then isn’t that the point of a forums website? Short of echochambers, memes, and porn, the biggest thing on forums is two way discussions. You post a question, maybe with an idea of how people might respond, and you could get a varying degree of different responses. Some of which may offer fresh insights that you may not have had the perspective for before. Do you consider the responses in this thread to be negative?

  • @[email protected]
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    114 months ago

    Probably mostly to warn others. Sometimes to point out information I believe is wrong. Mostly I’m trying to keep the ship on course.

    • @[email protected]
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      44 months ago

      That is (and I’m really not joking) actually an altruistic motivation.

      Good people give bad news.

    • @[email protected]
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      24 months ago

      Just realize that crossing the line is when you become pedantic. No one likes that, especially when it’s obvious what someone meant. Took me a while to realize that and then stop.

      • @[email protected]
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        14 months ago

        Always. If you aren’t communicating with the intent to exchange meaning you’re communicating in bad faith.

  • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠
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    84 months ago

    I really hate begged questions. You know the thing: “Why do Americans buy groceries at Walmart?” The premise is wrong, and needs to be corrected to get an accurate and representative answer. “Most Americans buy groceries at dedicated grocery stores. I never shop at Walmart at all.”

    Or: “Who’s your favorite character in Final Fantasy 7?” “I don’t have one, I tried FF7 but couldn’t get into it.” followed by OP saying some bullshit like “Then I wasn’t asking you.”

    A clear sign someone’s looking for confirmation, not understanding.

  • @[email protected]
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    74 months ago

    I very much dislike being negative on-line. I think we could all stand to be more empathetic and humble in our approach to others. In my on-line gaming, I almost exclusively am positive. The rare times I turn negative, is when someone starts being mean to someone. Flaming, blaming, or just posting vile stuff. THAT, I take exception to. Bullies only understand one thing, and it’s their own medicine. I’m all positivity until you post something racist, sexist, or generally vile, then I’m coming at you both guns a’blazing.

    • @Mascara
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      14 months ago

      Well I dislike being positive or faking that everything’s okay just to not upset people

      • @[email protected]
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        34 months ago

        those are two different things. When things are bad, it’s our duty to address it, lest it become worse. But you can be positive even in the face of a crisis. There are times in my life in which I felt like my world was crumbling before my eyes, and with the benefit of hindsight, I now view those circumstances differently. Sometimes hard changes need to be made, and you can come out the other side stronger and more resilient for having survived it; often times in a better place than you were before (whether that’s physically, mentally, emotionally). Then, with those lessons learned, the next moment you feel like the sky is falling, you can remind yourself that you’ve been through bad before, and sometimes a new perspective is the only thing standing between you and acceptance/peace.

        Also, if you’re having to avoid talking about things because it upsets people, then try to find a new avenue for who you speak that to. I recommend therapy, where the attention and purpose is you and your feelings. Having someone listen, and help you through difficult times/emotions, is an invaluable resource, that I hope you’re fortunate enough to be able to take advantage of.

  • Lvxferre
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    74 months ago

    Two reasons:

    1. I value frankness above tact, discourse (what is said) over tone (how it’s said).
    2. I have little to no tolerance towards some types of irrationality and bullshit, and I enjoy calling them out.
  • HubertManne
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    54 months ago

    its just part of the conversation. If all these communities were just rah rah, preach to the choir, I would likely stop participating. I am in no way saying all comments should be negative or such but I expect discourse and different points of view. Positive or negative I prefer the comments and posts to be as thoughtful and informative as possible.

  • I Cast Fist
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    44 months ago

    Because I’m a negative nancy

    It really depends on the matter at hand. I think sometimes it feels cathartic, other times it’s just questionable rambling because I feel like getting it off my chest.

  • @[email protected]
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    44 months ago

    Depends what counts as a negative comment. I tend to swim upstream so the things I say often aren’t popular but I only say what I believe to be true. Why people who for example don’t like Elon Musk, keep posting about him and then circlejerking with all the other haters is beyond me.

  • @[email protected]
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    44 months ago

    Depends on how you take the situation. I’d say on one side I hope to warn others with my cautionary tale. I also feel understood when I see others reply they shared my pain through similar experiences after reading mine, so I guess you can call that cathartic? Not sure. It also helps me calibrate myself socially, as I can measure how much others agree or disagree with my hate of whatever.