• @leftzero
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    104 hours ago

    Wait, I thought this was already the national bird: 🖕

  • @[email protected]
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    197 hours ago

    Actually the Senate passed this in July. It took until now for Congress to pass literally the easiest partisan bill probably because they were waiting to use it as their next shitty rider platform, or because they were too busy wasting time creating a new committee to investigate TikTok.

  • circuitfarmer
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    2110 hours ago

    Ah yes, really focusing on the important shit here. I can see why the US is doing so well.

    • @[email protected]
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      58 hours ago

      It is time to dissolve the United States. Once a nation reaches this level of corruption and political dysfunction, it cannot be repaired. Even the nominally liberal party is so utterly corrupted by money that it can no longer keep things from further degrading, let alone actually fix things. We are at our “dissolution of the Soviet Union” moment.

      The national government needs to be dissolved in its entirety. Each state needs to be granted full independence. Then individual states can come back together and form whatever new federations or confederations they want.

      This nation can no longer be salvaged. It is broken beyond all repair. It’s time we put it out of its misery. The alternative is we limp along as a parody of our former self, like the Roman Empire pretending to still be a Republic.

      The United States is already dead. We’re just too afraid to admit it.

      • @[email protected]
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        127 hours ago

        Buddy. We are nowhere near where we used to be. We used to call out the soldiers to shoot at striking workers. We used to grow out our hair so we could get paid for voting 3 or 4 times. (Get a shave, get a haircut, lose the mustache and the rest of the hair.) It used to be impossible to convict anyone of killing a black man.

        We aren’t anywhere near as bad as things have been in the past.

        • @[email protected]
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          53 hours ago

          And the Soviet Union at its collapse wasn’t as bad as the nadirs or tsarist Russia. Just because things were worse 150 years ago doesn’t matter. The problem is the system is now intractably broken and further progress cannot be made.

          • @[email protected]
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            12 hours ago

            It’s broken for 4 years at least, sure… But it’s not beyond hope. Did you see share that Luigi guy did the other day? That dude was American, and he’s broken far less laws than our next president.

      • @[email protected]
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        108 hours ago

        What do you propose happens to the nuclear weapons? Or the treasures in the Smithsonian? Or the gold in Fort Knox? Or the federal currency that each of these states economies relies on?

        The US simply cannot be undone.

        • @[email protected]
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          28 hours ago

          Nominally give each new state a proportional share of the weapons. In reality, the states will quickly come back together into one or a handful of new countries. Nuclear weapons are incredibly expensive to maintain. A newly independent North Dakota will not be able to maintain the weapons that are assigned to it. They’ll quickly trade them as bargaining chips in negotiations with some larger state.

          It’s important to consider the alternative to dissolution. We are no longer capable of solving real problems. The currency and economy are already doomed, as we’re not going to be able to put our fiscal house in order before the debt collapses everything.

          A major economic upheaval is already locked in, assured by our irreparable political system. Better to just admit it now and dissolve the country peacefully. The alternative is we have a series of bloody and ruinous civil wars as states try to break away one by one from the dying empire.

          • @[email protected]
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            118 hours ago

            They’ll quickly trade them as bargaining chips in negotiations with some larger state.

            Full stop. If part of your solution is selling nuclear weapons to whoever pays the most to cover your bills your plan is already shit.

            • @[email protected]
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              17 hours ago

              That’s literally what happened at the dissolution of the Soviet Union. This has been done before.

                • @[email protected]
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                  13 hours ago

                  Well, we haven’t had any exploded nukes yet, and any lost have expired by now. So I think it went down pretty well actually.

      • @[email protected]
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        16 hours ago

        The problem is that the second the federal government fully collapses and states are left on their own, a majority of them will become captured by megacorporations or China. Red states like Mississippi just fail to function on their own, they would require an entity with seriously sizable funding to subsidize them, and the number of entities that can fit that bill is pretty small. Even if these red states band together…they’re the worst states. 5 of them together doesn’t equal the income brought in by places like California or New York, who would perhaps instead enjoy a large surplus of state funding they could make use of and maintain individuality in the face of a corporate dystopia.

        • @[email protected]
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          13 hours ago

          They would still be among the wealthier countries on the planet. Mississippi is wealthier than the UK outside of London. They’ll manage just fine. As far as corporate corruption, well they can be responsible for their own sins.

  • Jesus
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    8113 hours ago

    The real national bird is the boneless chicken.

      • KingJalopy
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        2413 hours ago

        Never had a national bird, according to this article. Thank God our infinitely wise and useful government got on that before they lost all their power to actually do anything meaningful or helpful. 🦅🇺🇸

      • Eugene V. Debs' Ghost
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        712 hours ago

        It’s what Franklin wanted. And Franklin had humor and consistent set of morals. And got France to back us up by having sex with so many French women.

        I think the Turkey would be better than a bird we have to ADR in the screech of another animal.

        • @[email protected]
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          1011 hours ago

          Turkeys: invasive, will absolutely move in and fuck up your shit

          Bald Eagle: almost went extinct because it ran out of a particular type of tree.

          Turkeys: will eat literally anything under the sun. Grass. Seeds. Other, smaller inferior turkeys. Car bumpers.

          Bald eagles: almost went extinct because salmon was in short supply.

          Turkeys: big, fat, aggressive birds with absolutely no fucks to give. The Always Sunny crew if they were all birds and not just D.

          Bald Eagles: sleek, reclusive, and quiet. Literally sounds like a mouse.

          It’s turkeys, it was always turkeys. It’s not even close.

          • @[email protected]
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            28 hours ago

            It was hunting (considered pests) and DDT (pesticide that made the eggshells break too easily) that made eagles almost go extinct.

  • @[email protected]
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    5014 hours ago

    It’s not like if they didn’t pass this law they would have snuck in Medicare for all - I hate the “Is this a good use of your time” argument.

    But it’s never a bad time to criticize how ineffective lawmakers are.

    • @[email protected]
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      4813 hours ago

      Anything other than this would’ve had an impact on people’s lives. They don’t need universal healthcare. They need something.

      Your comment is a prime example of the nirvana fallacy.

      • @[email protected]
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        1513 hours ago

        this session has been a dud from the start.

        a split congress isn’t gonna get much of anything worthwhile done, especially not this late in a session… and extra-especially-not with the ultra hyper-partisanship exhibited by the ‘modern’ republicant party since at least the 1990s.

        want something done? something awesome and good? help get democrats and progressives 75%+ of each chamber of congress, plus 38+ state legislatures.

        • @[email protected]
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          49 hours ago

          Republicans get large chunks of what they want without a majority like that in Congress on a regular basis. If they can do it so could Democrats. They choose not to. There’s no shortage of convenient scapegoats but there is a massive shortage of meaningful action.

          • @[email protected]
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            13 hours ago

            My dude, they couldn’t even repeal Obamacare.

            Dems get blasted for not doing enough. Republicans get praise for just stopping things, half of which weren’t happening anyway

            Thanks, Republicans for another decade without letting the Dems take our guns. Fuck the Dems for not passing some very basic gun control legislation.

          • @[email protected]
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            16 hours ago

            I feel like you’re missing the very clear context that Republicans are hyper partisan who refuse to cross the isle. Earlier this year they voted down their own border security bill because Biden gave it the greenlight.

            • @[email protected]
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              14 hours ago

              I’m very aware of the context. For my entire life Democrats have spent more time talking about building coalitions with racists or pointing at their token centrist progress blocker than they have doing anything useful. Say what you like about Republicans but they get their horrible shit done when they have the chance and they don’t give a fuck about decorum or tradition and their voters love them for it.

        • ALQ
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          413 hours ago

          But only if they’re made in China.

    • IHeartBadCode
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      2213 hours ago

      The 118th Session? Yeah, we don’t even have a parallel in all of the history of the US to mark how unproductive this session has been. Like not even during the Civil War was Congress this underwhelming. The 118th Session has set a new low water mark for “things gotten done”.

      The biggest issue was that the House spent something like ~60% of their time in Committee doing “investigations” that ultimately led nowhere. Like, I’ll throw Congress a bone here, if they actually impeached someone with all those investigations, I’d give it to them. But that literally nobody was impeached all those investigations basically go into the “wasted time” column.

      And they can’t impeach any of them come the 119th session because… New President, new people. So all that time they invested goes to waste. Hell, even Hunter I can’t give it to them, because in the end, he got a pardon. And as soon as Trump gives the J6 folks a pardon, all that work the Democrats did becomes wasted as well.

      But the 118th spent the vast majority of their time in investigations, so they got so little actually done and passed.

    • @[email protected]
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      49 hours ago

      They could get a vote on the record where Republicans voted against healthcare. We got this bird thing though, so that’s neat.

    • @[email protected]
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      28 hours ago

      They could have tried to do anything actually beneficial for Americans instead though. Like, think about how many hours of work it took Klobuchar’s political peons just to draft the stupid thing. And, they we paid them to do it!! Get fucked Congress.

    • @[email protected]
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      310 hours ago

      This is so true. Can you walk and chew gum at the same time? Listen to a podcast while driving? Even our US Representatives can focus on more than one thing at a time…

      • @[email protected]
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        39 hours ago

        Ok sure, but what’s one other thing they’re focused on that actually helps regular Americans? Biden is pardoning his family members, Pelosi is grinding the gears of progress to a halt with her withered corpse, most of the rest of the DNC are wringing their hands about the past or apparently daydreaming about birds, who knows what the fuck Kamala is up to, and Republicans are gearing up to put a bunch of sexual predators in charge of various government agencies.

        Ukraine seems to be getting some money so that’s nice I guess. Is there something useful to the American people that I’m missing?

        • KillingTimeItself
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          28 hours ago

          Ok sure, but what’s one other thing they’re focused on that actually helps regular Americans?

          probably like 20 odd pieces of legislation, probably more, sitting around.

    • @[email protected]
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      13 hours ago

      It’s not like if they didn’t pass this law they would have snuck in Medicare for all

      I might have been at least somewhat mollified of “Natural Bird” meant “New environmental focus on protecting the species” rather than “National Meme”. Might as well make America’s national bird the Dodo, given the rate at which we’re decimating their ecology.

      • @[email protected]
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        112 hours ago

        The bald eagle is well protected as a species. Federal charges for killing one. Course that may change under Trump.

  • @[email protected]
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    9 hours ago

    Doesn’t seem very fitting. Maybe pick one of those birds that eat eggs from other species, replaces with their own and then their babies destroy the other eggs.

  • KillingTimeItself
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    28 hours ago

    i mean, less than ideal time, but this was a long time coming, you should look into the laws surrounding bald eagles, one of the most protected species in the US lol.

    • Skua
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      812 hours ago

      Actually no I really kinda wish it was so I can get more of him trying desperately to act like he isn’t terrified of the eagle brought in for a photo shoot. That shit was priceless