Oh, the pandemic-industrial complex is back on the menu. We’ve spent decades industrializing agriculture into viral petri dishes, then act shocked when nature mutates around our hubris. Cows are just the latest domino—watch the blame shift to “wet markets” or migratory birds while factory farms keep hosing antibiotics into troughs.

But sure, let’s hyperventilate about proximity to doom. Never mind that zoonotic spillover’s been a ticking clock since we decided monoculture and profit margins trump ecosystem logic. The real virus here? Capitalism with a side of amnesia.