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I do benefit from reading these accounts. Helps ground me. My kid sometimes makes me feel like he’s completely unglued, an assiduous non-participant in consensus reality. “Mayonnaise is spicy,” or he will calmly inform me that “my favourite green thing is nobody because nobody is green”. Doesn’t remember anything about anything, totally time blind, filled with chaotic impulses that leave him perennially scraped and bruised.
And yet on the sliding scale of kids in general, he’s basically lucid.
I diagnose your child with white.
Also if it’s real mayo, he might be referring to the slight acidity.
He was three at the time, it was a vocab issue. Still funny years later.