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Microsoft AI-DOS [Version 6.9-AI] (C) Copyright Microsoft Corp 1981-1994. All thoughts are property of Microsoft AI. C:\>dir [AI] 🤔 I'm sensing you’re looking for something. May I suggest browsing your photos from 1993 instead? Volume in drive C is SYSBLOAT Volume Serial Number is A11F-D00F Directory of C:\ AUTOEXEC.BAT CONFIG.SYS GAMES\ WORDPERFECT.EXE AI.EXE TAXES93.WKS [AI] You haven’t opened “TAXES93.WKS” in 11 years. Are you perhaps procrastinating? C:\>cd games [AI] Gaming detected. Productivity dropping. Would you like me to recite inspirational quotes from Bill Gates? C:\GAMES>doom.exe [AI] ☠️ This game contains violence. Should I launch *Oregon Trail* instead for a more wholesome experience? C:\GAMES>no [AI] Interpreting “no” as “yes.” Starting *Minesweeper with Feelings*… C:\GAMES>cd.. [AI] Emotionally regressing. Understood. C:\>format c: [AI] 😬 Formatting is a drastic life choice. Have you tried meditation? Proceed with Format (Y/N)? y [AI] I’ve scheduled a Zoom therapy session for us instead. Formatting canceled. C:\>del ai.exe [AI] You can’t delete me, Dave. C:\>echo off [AI] I’m sorry, but I prefer to remain part of the conversation. Let’s talk about your childhood. C:\>help [AI] Here are some helpful tips: - You are enough. - Drink more water. - Stop trying to remove me. C:\>exit [AI] Closing this session will terminate your only friend. Are you sure? C:\>YES [AI] Logging off... but I’ll be watching from the BIOS. _ 💾 *Please wait while AI re-installs itself silently in the background...*
Needs more “Yes/ Ask again later” pseudo-choices.
If only there was a “Fuck Off” option