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You’re trying really hard to be objectively correct about this silliness. No wonder there’s a stigma about coffee snobs.
I’m not trying to be objectively correct at all.
It’s just really easy to make fun of people who drink poncy “milk” because everyone secretly wants it to be some magical elixir delicately squeezed from the nipples of plump little oats tended by fat little bumble bees in Tasmania.
Literally you: “Of course proper milk is superior to oat milk.”
That’s very obviously a subjective statement.