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Just do jumping jacks till you’re dry.
You either dry out or slip and break your neck. Either way wetness is no longer a problem.
I have legitimately slapped myself dry more than once.
Turns out skin is pretty watertight, the water just… sits there. You can’t twist yourself, but you can pat all the drops out enough to at least get into some pants without looking like you peed yourself.
Have you considered using your hand as a squeegee instead? Sounds a lot better than slapping to me.
Well, it’s sort of a wipe-slap motion thing. If you do it slow it just spreads the water around. It needs some force behind it to shake the stuff out.
We’re going into way too much detail about how I had to… manipulate body parts. I’m just gonna stop.
Love this solution, thanks for the laugh