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The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 month ago

Snopes says that this is unconfirmed, but the rumor persists.

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Snopes says that this is unconfirmed, but the rumor persists.

The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.world to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 month ago
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  • Xande@discuss.tchncs.de
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    17 hours ago

    If you do it the right way… one hit should suffice.

  • AdamBomb@lemmy.sdf.org
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    1 month ago

    +3 to hit vs. Popes, Cardinals, and Bishops. On hit, Popes who are alive but playing dead must save vs. Fortitude or die.

  • Dem Bosain@midwest.social
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    1 month ago

    It’s a silver hammer, so it could also check if the Pope is a werewolf.

    • The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 month ago

      Can’t let that happen again.

      • rockerface 🇺🇦@lemm.ee
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        1 month ago

        …again?

        • Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 month ago

          The events inspired the band Powerwolf.

    • Klear@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      “The Pope was bitten by a wolf while going out for a shit. Somebody call Maxwell!”

    • postmateDumbass@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Check the bathroom window for finger prints.

  • kersploosh@sh.itjust.works
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    1 month ago

    Bang bang Vatican’s gilded hammer came down on his head
    do do dooo do
    Bang bang Vatican’s gilded hammer made sure that he was dead
    whoa-o whoa-o whoa-o whoa-o

    • GraniteM@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      Pope Joan was quizzical…

  • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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    1 month ago

    The hammer is actually a 100lb two handed weapon

  • bdot@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    my favourite fact is that “factoid” doesn’t mean “little fact” but is actually starting to mean that

    • creamlike504@jlai.lu
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      1 month ago

      What does it actually mean?

      Edit: Nevermind, @[email protected] already answered.

    • logos@sh.itjust.works
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      1 month ago

      In this case it seems to fit pretty well.

  • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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    1 month ago

    Hit him once. If he is silent, hit him again. If he is silent again, hit him again. If he remains silent, he is dead.

    Hit him once. If he shouts, you’ve got two more swings to make him stop.

  • Pacrat173@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    Snopes says unproven and the Vatican claims is a myth.

    • usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca
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      1 month ago

      So it’s correctly labeled as a factoid then

      • Jerkface (any/all)@lemmy.ca
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        1 month ago

        The -oid suffix is used to describe something that appears like something else, but is not that thing. An asteroid is something that looks like a star, but isn’t. A factoid is something that looks like a fact, but isn’t.

        I used to introduce my common-law partner as my “wifeoid.” She hated that but sometimes it is okay to put your own pleasure first.

        • lime!@feddit.nu
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          1 month ago

          it’s uncomfortably close to “femoid”

          • Jerkface (any/all)@lemmy.ca
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            1 month ago

            It was a different time.

        • FackCurs@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          A droid looks like a Dr. but isn’t? Am I getting this right?

          • SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            Comes from Android. Like a human but isn’t.

  • Nougat@fedia.io
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    1 month ago

    Equipped creature has +1/+1. Sacrifice to destroy target artifact or enchanment.

    • f4f4f4f4f4f4f4f4@sopuli.xyz
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      D’oh, it should say “another target Cleric” to avoid confusion.

  • InFerNo@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    Is it to make sure, or is it to make sure?

    • scuppie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 month ago

      The MitreSmiter 9000. Puts all doubt to rest.

  • 🍪CRUMBGRABBER🍪@lemm.ee
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    1 month ago

    What about the holy hand grenade?

    • sik0fewl@lemmy.ca
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      1 month ago

      First shalt thou take out the Holy Hammer. Then, shalt thou strike three times, no more, no less.

      Three shalt be the number thou shalt strike, and the number of the striking shall be three. Four shalt thou not strike, nor either strike thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out.

      Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, thy pope shall snuff it.

      • bradinutah@thelemmy.club
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        1 month ago

        Gotta love The Book of Armaments.

        • Frostbeard@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          It even used to be in Warhammer 40k as wargear for the Space Marine chapter Black Templars. Special hand grenades called Holy Orbs of Antioch

    • derpgon@programming.dev
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      1 month ago

      HAAAALELUJAH

  • OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    I bought one of those at Harbor Freight for like ¼ the price the Vatican probably paid.

    • KingJalopy @lemm.ee
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      1 month ago

      Yeah but it breaks after hitting 2 popes

      • lime!@feddit.nu
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        1 month ago

        that’s still a good 40-50 years of use!

      • Nougat@fedia.io
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        1 month ago

        Still cheaper to replace when it breaks than the Snap-On one.

        • KingJalopy @lemm.ee
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          1 month ago

          That’s the cool thing about harbor freight. How many popes you really gonna hit on any given day?

          • Nougat@fedia.io
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            1 month ago

            In all seriousness, my dad was a mechanic, and he’d buy HF air impact guns instead of Mac or Matco or Snap-On. The nice ones cost four to six times as much, and needed to be serviced about every 18 months, during which time he was down a gun.

            So he’d buy two or three HF guns, use one till it broke in six months, switch to another, replenish stock at his convenience.

            • i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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              1 month ago

              Secondhand, Harbor Freight, and Ryobi is the way for most tools.

          • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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            1 month ago

            As many as it takes.

    • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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      1 month ago

      I was just thinking that Stanley Tools should capitalize on Stanley’s success and release a line of replica ceremonial tools backed by a viral campaign instead of suing them for their success.

      I would probably buy a replica pope whacker, the U.S. congressional mace if virally advertised, or even a golden shovel, engraved with a jaunty nihilistic saying, like “Digging my own grave!”

      • KingJalopy @lemm.ee
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        1 month ago

        I got a golden shovel for Christmas 2017. I was (am) obsessed with twin peaks and my wife made one for me like from the show (the comeback season or whatever). Because I have to dig myself out of the shit.

  • Xerxos@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    “One” hit

    “Two” hit Pope: “Ouch!”

    …

    …

    “What do we do now?” “Just hit harder, it’s a self-solving problem”

    • Klear@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      “Three” smash Pope: “OUCH!!!”

      …

      …

      “Now what?”

    • Hupf@feddit.org
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      1 month ago

      Bring out your dead!

  • Lady Butterfly @lazysoci.al
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    1 month ago

    Well you have to be sure. I wonder where they keep the Pope hammer in between deaths

    • Rolder@reddthat.com
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      1 month ago

      Maybe the pope gets a bonk every day to ensure that he is, in fact, still alive?

      • Lady Butterfly @lazysoci.al
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        1 month ago

        Could be, it’s the only bonk he’ll get

      • Cort@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        Only if he’s sleeping VERY soundly.

    • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      He carries it under his pointy hat

      • OCATMBBL@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        The Hammer of Pope-o-cles.

    • MintyFresh@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      In the popemobile trunk. Obviously…

  • El_Azulito@lemmy.world
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    I have one of these on my coffee table that’s decoration. Found it just laying in some room when I visited the Vatican in the 90s. Weird.

    • Etterra@discuss.online
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      It gives +5 to-hit and damage, +2d6 holy damage, +5 to carpentry skill, and can only be equipped by Catholics. It deals double damage to lycanthropes.

      • InverseParallax@lemmy.world
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        Yeah, but the lawful evil alignment restriction, fuck that.

    • SchwertImStein@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 month ago

      may we have a photo?

      • El_Azulito@lemmy.world
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        1 month ago

        • IninewCrow@lemmy.ca
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          1 month ago

          Silas? Is that you?

        • Etterra@discuss.online
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          1 month ago

          I think it also has a set bonus with the crown. There’s a shroud in that set too, IIRC.

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