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trashcan@sh.itjust.worksM to The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.works · 2 months ago

Sean Combs Asks For Quick Trial So He Can Get To Part Where Trump Pardons Him

theonion.com

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Sean Combs Asks For Quick Trial So He Can Get To Part Where Trump Pardons Him

theonion.com

trashcan@sh.itjust.worksM to The Onion and other satire w/ layers@sh.itjust.works · 2 months ago
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NEW YORK—Insisting that they were all busy people with things to do, Sean “Diddy” Combs reportedly asked a U.S. district court judge for a quick trial Tuesday so that he could just get to the part where President Trump pardons him. “With all due respect, your honor, can we skip some of the preamble and […]
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  • njm1314@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Well fuck this was depressing. This is one of those things where you laugh at first and then you realize there’s actually a really good chance of it being true.

    • trashcan@sh.itjust.worksOPM
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      2 months ago

      Yep

      After Combs’ statement, the judge was said to have sat in stunned silence for a full minute before admitting the defendant did have a point.

    • tacosanonymous@lemm.ee
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      2 months ago

      Both satire and general political humor are not funny to me anymore. I’m just so burnt.

  • Alexstarfire@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Almost ate the onion.

  • protist@mander.xyz
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    2 months ago

    Even if pardoned, he’ll be wrapped up in civil litigation for the rest of his life. What’s happening to Mike Lindell may be a glimpse into Diddy’s future if he avoids prison.

  • Kurious84@eviltoast.org
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    2 months ago

    Fell for it.

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