It’s been a while since I last posted, but here it goes.
So mom hired this new attorney about 4 years ago. She is a real battle-axe. The motto of her firm is that “Some people don’t have the stomach for our type of litigation, so it’s not for everyone” and our clients are “primarily wealthy”. Does that tell you a handful already? The poor children that suffer under these types of attorneys.
My ex has been pushing for a minor’s counsel ever since she onboarded this attorney. A minor’s counsel is an attorney for the child or children. They represent the interests of the children and they charge family law attorney fees of $400 - $500 per hour to listen to what the child has to say and force the parents to pay and comply. So, child wants to live with mom 100% she lives with mom, child wants to live with dad 100%, child lives with dad. Child wants to join $10,000 basketball association, parents are forced to comply and pay for it. As with the rest of the family law industry it’s in the attorneys best interest to churn issues. The more issues the more money they make.
So, mom has been tainting our children’s minds and allowing our children to make decisions of their own. Life choice decisions that they are not ready to make. It’s call parentification and it’s harmful. At the same time anytime that dad disapproves of something, he is automatically branded unsupportive of his child’s needs. It’s very interesting, because this is a woman that paid more in legal fees to avoid paying child support to dad than what was owed in child support. If that tells you anything. Let’s look at an email a couple of days ago where I try to address the brainwashing of one of my children. She is 12 y/o and badmouthing from her mom’s home is not uncommon as I have experienced it since our child could talk.
From Dad
Lately, I’ve noticed a change in Kassy. Whenever decisions don’t align with her wishes, she becomes quite vocal. One of these disagreements she mentioned that she’s expressed a desire to decide where she lives once she turns 14.
Additionally, she often uses phrases like, “you’re not understanding my needs” and "why should I believe in God.” I can’t help but notice that these sound similar to your viewpoints.
I’m concerned that there may be an intention to sway Kassy’s perspective of me or to distance her from me. I truly request that we avoid this. My love for Kassy is immense, and hearing her voice such sentiments is deeply hurtful. We may have differing opinions on parenting, but for Kassy’s sake, it’s crucial that we present a united front. No matter our personal disputes or legal challenges, I always try to shield Kassy from our disagreements. It’s essential for her well-being to have a positive relationship with both her parents. My hope is for us to cooperate in raising Kassy, but it often feels like I can only please you by acquiescing to all your wishes. This has been a recurring feeling over the years, and it saddens me. I urge you to consider Kassy’sfeelings and well-being. It’s crucial for her emotional health to not harbor resentment towards either of us. I hope our differences wouldn’t overshadow our mutual love for her.
If I’ve inadvertently upset you, I apologize. My main priority is ensuring Kassy’s happiness and well-being.
From Mom
She has a right to her own opinions, needs and what she wants. She is getting older if you haven’t noticed and should have her own opinions. She knows how you are and senses what she senses. The school teaches her to advocate for herself and so do I.
From Dad
Ever since you engaged your current attorney, which I believe has been for the past 3-4 years, you’ve sought minor’s counsel. I’m concerned about what perceptions might have been influenced during that period.
From Mom
Why don’t you learn to support her and listen to her instead of forcing what you want on her.
From Dad
I support our daughter 100% on what she wants to do. There is absolutely no use in discussing this with you any further.
Goodnight.
Pretty sure this is bullshit but if it’s true yeah your the crazy one. Why is “why should I believe in God” an example of her disagreeing with you or being brainwashed? I was raised Catholic by two parents that never separated, I asked this question when I was 11. She’s a teenager or preteen. Your gonna get a lot more of this soon, better make peace with it earlier rather than later. Support doesn’t mean " yeah sure do whatever". It means a conversation about consequences and benefits, and a certain level of trust.
Thanks for your input. What specifically do you think is bullshit? You addressed a small fraction of the issues but not all. I would sincerely want to know.
Nah I just think this is fake. That’s what I meant by bullshit. The last place any sane person would ask for parenting advise is on Lemmy.
But to provide more details I’d first need more details. For example you said your child is being brainwashed, but only provided examples of free thinking. Is this a simple case of a teenager waking up and starting to question their surroundings? the mother is supportive of this while you aren’t? Or is their actual indoctrination here? child council isn’t indoctrination.
So far you’ve given no real details other than " I’m involved with a legal dispute with the mother of my child, my child is parroting the mothers point of view, is this brainwashing". Like dude we don’t fuckin know, we’re on the Internet. It could be that your wife is evil and manipulative and brainwashing your daughter. It could be that your stubborn and controlling and unwilling to accept that your daughter has a mind of her own and may be taking her mom’s side in whatever’s going on. Who knows.
Your perspective is acknowledged. Could you point out where in my post I sought guidance? Indeed, I don’t recall posing any questions to whichever readers this was meant for. What about my remark regarding my child being exposed to negative talk from an early age was unclear to you?
Rest assured, if you were to consult my circle of friends and family about my role as a parent, they would attest to my commitment and love as a father. Why does my child feel such a strong urge to decide her residence once she’s 14?
This sub has a limited audience of 16 subscribers. Have you considered that I might be addressing a specific group here?
But then again, who can say?
Literally the name of the community is “am I the crazy one?”
Don’t want guidance? Don’t post a story in a literal question based community. Then ask for clarification when someone answers the question.
Also just a heads up, all post in all communities are visible by all federated communities unless their respective moderators defederate. So this is being broadcast to a lot more than 16 people.
Anyways, good luck with your daughter. I genuinely hope she can understand your point of view 10 years from now.
Thanks. And stay away from those priests.
Lol is that a rape joke? 10/10 father of a daughter material right there. It’s all making sense now lol.
Isn’t it like a Father Murphy touched you in your secret spot kinda thing? That;s what I got from that. But since yo’re from the .ml world, I’d offer you my promise that I might cover your ass in the line of fire, but not like a priest would. lol
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