![Employee retention [Work Chronicles]](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/c9ea844b-e6d8-4a72-88a7-ca763471006f.jpeg){kind=link}
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That’s why I apply for jobs on company time.
Boss made a dollar
I made a dime,
That was a poem.
From a simpler time.Now boss makes a thousand.
And gives us a cent
While he’s got employees.
Who can’t pay the rent.So when boss makes a million.
And the workers make jack.
Then that’s when we riot.
And take our lives back.
I love this poem. Definitely saving for later. I dont know what I will do with it other than reread it from time to time, but that is enough for me.
I remember seeing it but couldn’t find the original author. I like it though.
In the US civil service the website used for applying for government jobs (USAjobs) is whitelisted and it’s pretty commonplace to see people using it at work, on their work machines.
Why stop there? Why don’t we just load everyone with work?
Even volunteers. Yup. The amount of colleges and hospitals and everything else you can think of looking for e.g. older retirees who are bored, or young teens who need experience or whatever, they’ll take it all. Without paying them a cent. Then when they get enough of those, they start to cut back on the paid staff. The poor volunteers do not even realize that by “helping” they are putting people out of real jobs:-(. [Edit: which then continues that cycle where they have to beg for more help b/c they are in such “need” and won’t someone think of the poor children, or the people undergoing cancer treatment or whatever - don’t you want to… “help”?] Meanwhile the managers are seen walking around in expensive italian shoes…
Even the most non-profit activities can be weaponized to become a tool to make moar money, if only you are willing to do that to people! 🤮
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What job site hides jobs from people?
Do they hide them so you will pay for a better search result?
I’m currently searching for a job for after I relocated to a new town and Indeed sucks ass, I choose the town and it gives me jobs in other provinces.
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I’ve never logged into Indeed, but likely they are using trackers to see who I am and what jobs I’m looking at.
Google sucks, many ads were expired but still showed up in the results.
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That’s too many clicks for me, I have to launch the browser and find the bookmark folder? I can just run my script.
What do you do on the computer that your browser is not already open?
Once it’s open you can middle-click the folder to open all bookmarks inside.
Feel more 1337 than everyone else.
Bro, do you even Arch?
AHK is only on Windows btw
I open those in chrome without any add-ons, I normally use Firefox with add-ons that can cause problems with some websites. I don’t want to have to look for a bookmark folder, I just want to click thing on desktop. I can also modify the script later if I want to add an input box in order to search for specific jobs on all the sites at once.
Just use your phone lol
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Far too real.
I’m gonna find a way to share with as many colleagues as I can.
Far too real.
A meeting - Ok
The boss asking a clear question - Unlikely
People actively brainstorming - Possible enough
The boss listening instead of just going with whatever he decided beforehand - Completely impossible
Yes, the process is unrealistic for comedic effect.
I probably should have explicitly stated I meant the conclusion. Perhaps this is the boss’s imagined thought process to reach that predefined conclusion that they announce at the end of the meeting.
Is there a community for funny comics? I need more humor in my life, not whatever this is.
edit: there is [email protected]
Not just here either
I swear every humor-based Lemmy community eventually becomes a “definitely not making strawmen to support my political views” bitchfest
Let’s also try mandating RTO while we’re at it.
I get pretty legitimate and interesting offers sent to my work inbox.
Recruiters looking for people with my experience in the role dgaf lol they just want their bonus. One of these days I might just reply and see how far I can take it before someone of my end notices…
“Appreciate their work” is a pretty weak suggestion too…
Oof, that’s too real. I haven’t experienced that but one of my friends is currently experiencing this lol
That’s not how you retain your top performers. You retain people all right, but your top performs ain’t it.
Is this comic written by AI or someone who hasn’t worked in a team in their life?
I mean… That’s the joke
Is it? My last few weeks on lemmy make me doubt it.