

I had the same dilemma. It comes down to this in my opinion:
- Do you trust yourself and your current networking gear, software, security setup enough to host this yourself at home?
- Do you trust your vps providers tech stack, ethics, privacy policy etc. AND your own ability to secure it to host it on a vps?
- Do you trust Tailscale the company who’s in the business of “zero trust vpn” solutions to use their product?
I didn’t check if they were audited and if so how, but I went with the free Tailscale option, the most comfortable option for me now. Might change once I get more competent at the subject.
I was a “hyperactive” kid, I am not sure if I even have ADHD. It sure feels like I do or at least did have more severe symptoms when I was a kid. I kind of turned out ok. I can live a healthy, full life, married. My parents barely have any idea of how and why I was a negligent, immature kid who couldn’t get better grades or make friends despite doing everything in my power.
Looking back, the support I would have needed is just patience, understanding, reassurance and acceptance. If there are proven methots that work with learning difficulties, then that! To this day learning more than surface level information is pure pain. Teach him how to learn in my opinion.
On the other hand, I am great at seeing the “big picture” and can derive information off of it to solve most of my problems on the go. It’s not a lost cause, it’s just different. Having to fit in society’s narrow minded “just because I said so” standards is what made me feel and act worse when I think of it.