The uncommunicative wife/oblivious husband stereotypes have existed for longer than I can remember. Is there any validity to them? They don’t seem like particularly healthy ways to deal with a problem.
I donno, Ive had this kind of ‘fight’ with my now wife pretty often. Im 30 now. She would ignore me or ‘make it obvious’ shes angry and I would go about my day. I told her again and again that I wouldnt play these stupid games and eventually she started discussing with me when she has a problem with something. She got it from her mother, thats how they dealt with problems in her family.
Here’s my hypothesis. Relationships have historically (with some exceptions) been patriarchal and dominating. Men held power in society, but still needed women. So emotionally absent, toxic, authoritarian men looking for women, not for real companionship, but for reproduction and to have a servant basically. Women being forced into this role couldn’t openly express their issues without facing abuse so this culture of body language and subtle communication developed. This purely utilitarian and authoritarian style of relationship has been degrading in place of relationships built on mutual love and desire, but we still are influenced by how our parents treated each other, and each generation is slowly breaking away from this tradition. Some individuals more than others.
But this is not based on any sort of research or anything. This is my own uneducated guess and should be taken as such.
You have no idea. A friend of mine is going through a failed marriage. The husband’s mom thinks everything would just be fine if my friend was more “submissive” and just put up with the husband’s aggressive, temperamental, immature bullshit. The mom has been a doormat her whole life, and wonders why my friend can’t simply throw her self respect away and do the same. It’s equal parts infuriating and sad.
I’m so sorry your friend is going through that. Unfortunately, generational trauma is real and its slows if not full on stops progress. I hold this same sort of hypothesis for the education system. Why teachers continue to repeat the mistakes of the past and continue to use teacher-centered strategies despite most teachers believing in student-centered philosophies. We model our behavior off of those before us, and that leads us to make the same mistakes as them. Slowly shedding one or two things, but holding the majority. It requires an insane amount of deprogramming and self-reflection that we are not trained to do. I hope your friend is able to get away from all that toxicity and find a happy and healthy relationship. For their own sake, but also for future generations to learn from and hopefully we can collectively as a society work to break down these toxic habits
First of all the shit post is a JOKE that’s why it’s a shit post. Stereotypes only exist because they have some basis in fact. In general, NOT ALL, men are less talkative than women. It doesn’t make men or women bad… it just is
The uncommunicative wife/oblivious husband stereotypes have existed for longer than I can remember. Is there any validity to them? They don’t seem like particularly healthy ways to deal with a problem.
I donno, Ive had this kind of ‘fight’ with my now wife pretty often. Im 30 now. She would ignore me or ‘make it obvious’ shes angry and I would go about my day. I told her again and again that I wouldnt play these stupid games and eventually she started discussing with me when she has a problem with something. She got it from her mother, thats how they dealt with problems in her family.
Good job. I think that talking things out is always better than the “silent treatment”, which just builds resentment on both sides.
Here’s my hypothesis. Relationships have historically (with some exceptions) been patriarchal and dominating. Men held power in society, but still needed women. So emotionally absent, toxic, authoritarian men looking for women, not for real companionship, but for reproduction and to have a servant basically. Women being forced into this role couldn’t openly express their issues without facing abuse so this culture of body language and subtle communication developed. This purely utilitarian and authoritarian style of relationship has been degrading in place of relationships built on mutual love and desire, but we still are influenced by how our parents treated each other, and each generation is slowly breaking away from this tradition. Some individuals more than others.
But this is not based on any sort of research or anything. This is my own uneducated guess and should be taken as such.
Hey, this hypothesis sounds as good as any.
You have no idea. A friend of mine is going through a failed marriage. The husband’s mom thinks everything would just be fine if my friend was more “submissive” and just put up with the husband’s aggressive, temperamental, immature bullshit. The mom has been a doormat her whole life, and wonders why my friend can’t simply throw her self respect away and do the same. It’s equal parts infuriating and sad.
I’m so sorry your friend is going through that. Unfortunately, generational trauma is real and its slows if not full on stops progress. I hold this same sort of hypothesis for the education system. Why teachers continue to repeat the mistakes of the past and continue to use teacher-centered strategies despite most teachers believing in student-centered philosophies. We model our behavior off of those before us, and that leads us to make the same mistakes as them. Slowly shedding one or two things, but holding the majority. It requires an insane amount of deprogramming and self-reflection that we are not trained to do. I hope your friend is able to get away from all that toxicity and find a happy and healthy relationship. For their own sake, but also for future generations to learn from and hopefully we can collectively as a society work to break down these toxic habits
First of all the shit post is a JOKE that’s why it’s a shit post. Stereotypes only exist because they have some basis in fact. In general, NOT ALL, men are less talkative than women. It doesn’t make men or women bad… it just is
No, a good portion of stereotypes are just completely made up. Tiring hearing this justification.
I know shitposts are jokes, but sometimes jokes raise real questions. I’m not judging you or anyone else.
I guess I’m always fascinated how some people, not you, go to a group filled with jokes and just can’t laugh about it but must make an issue about it.