Tesla, a future case study for securities law classes across America, had to stop delivering Cybertrucks this past weekend. No, not because the hundred-thousand–dollar medium-duty pickup, which is only any of those things in the loosest interpretive sense, tends to brick when it gets rained on; nor because its stainless steel panels get all rusty and nasty-looking after weeks exposed to the rare, harsh condition of “being outside.” Perhaps you think it has something to do with the shorter-than-advertised driving range and longer-than-advertised charging time, but no: Rather, the cause of this snag is that the trucks struggle with the basics of stopping and going, by which I mean that the accelerator pedal cover slides off and gets stuck under a panel and locks the accelerator pressed down and keeps the Cybertruck stuck at maximum velocity.

Other Tesla models have had issues with speeding up and slowing down at the wrong times. The company was sued in 2017 by drivers whose cars drove themselves unexpectedly through garages and into walls; a German paper reported last year on over 2,400 complaints about sudden braking problems; and a safety researcher published a white paper showing how voltage spikes could lead Teslas to speed up without warning. You are supposed to like this because it means you are on the cutting edge, helping Elon Musk in his quest to save humanity.

Suckers who ordered Cybertrucks a few months or years ago and expected deliveries this weekend did not get their cars, nor a precise explanation for why they did not get their cars, but instead were simply told, “Hi, we have just been informed of an unexpected delay regarding the preparation of your vehicle. We need to cancel your delivery appointment for tomorrow and we will reach out again when we’re able to get you back on the schedule.” Maybe someone with a hot glue gun will get on this one.

  • @[email protected]
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    7 months ago

    I knew it was a trash site just from the title

    Lmaooooo

    Thanks for giving me another site to add to leechblock :)

    • @[email protected]
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      357 months ago

      Ahhh yes, that time tested tactic of shooting the messenger. No amount of website blocking is going to get around the fact the cybertruck is terrible.

    • @[email protected]
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      217 months ago

      Its true thats its a trash site but the fact remains. Tesla cars are big pieces of shit.

    • @[email protected]
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      77 months ago

      If you use reader mode you can get around that…

      And find you could’ve read the article in the same time as that…

      • @[email protected]
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        67 months ago

        No. I just block sites from ever appearing again if they force you to create an account or if it is behind s pay wall.

        Leechblock best add-on eva

        • @[email protected]
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          97 months ago

          So you’re the kinda guy that wouldn’t pay for a newspaper, but would rely on people handing out free flyers and propaganda?

          Well done, you fucked yourself 😂

            • @[email protected]
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              67 months ago

              I’m saying, learn how to bypass paywalls. That’s where the true journalism is

              Anything free is free for a reason

              Educate yourself

              • @[email protected]
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                77 months ago

                Be careful who you tell to educate themselves, it just might be someone who refuses to even read points that are incongruous with their own.

                Y’know, the type of person who reads a title, decides they hate the whole site because of the title, and then proceeds to blame the hate on something both completely unrelated AND totally fixable with minimal effort. Like, I dunno, a paywall?

              • @[email protected]
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                17 months ago

                I know how to, but I refuse unless it is THE ONLY SOURCE of some very important info (99% of the time it isn’t)