• @[email protected]
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    3 months ago

    Yea I found out from my server at a restaurant that my cousin killed himself. She was his friend. It had been months since it happened and no one told me that he passed, even though I saw my family recently. Fucked up.

    • @[email protected]
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      583 months ago

      People get really weird about suicide. Almost like they think talking about it will incentivize others to kill themselves.

      • @[email protected]
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        3 months ago

        there is a phenomenon known as “suicide contagion” or “copycat suicide,” where exposure to suicide can lead to an increase in suicide rates.
        Typically this occurs with media, like when a celebrity is in the news for suicide, but I believe there is still a relationship in just talking about it, especially in younger folks.

        https://www.cmaj.ca/content/185/10/861

        • @[email protected]
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          283 months ago

          I’m not saying there’s nothing to that but it seems to me that if the mere mention of suicide in just about any context is enough to send you over the edge then you were pretty close to falling off already. I find it difficult to attribute much to something like that.

          • @[email protected]
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            73 months ago

            Exactly. It doesn’t increase suicidal thoughts, it just reminds some that it’s an answer to their thoughts. The solution is reducing the stigma so that people can talk about them freely instead of bottling them up until they reach that point.

      • @[email protected]
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        3 months ago

        Yea I think my parents and uncle’s side are just old school and don’t like to talk about tough subjects.

  • candyman337
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    3 months ago

    My dad

    “Well your grandmother is out of the hospital”

    She was in the hospital???

  • @[email protected]
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    603 months ago

    “Son I’m going in for cancer surgery tomorrow. Everything will be fine… take care of your father, you know he’s basically useless on his own.”

    Literally 2 days ago. Don’t worry, she’s fine.

    • RiverGhost
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      263 months ago

      Mom did this to me also. On the same day of her radical mastectomy. I had no idea she had breast cancer.

      The surgery went ok at least.

      • @[email protected]
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        83 months ago

        Probably didn’t know how to tell you she might die. They really don’t give you much advice on how to talk to people… in my case it was literally a grade school style fill-in-the-blanks in-case-surgery-leaves-you-a-vegetable tell them we can have your organs work-book.

        But also likely a bit of narcissism… I’m sorry. Nobody she find out that way.

  • unalivejoy
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    593 months ago

    It’s because they post everything on Facebook and I don’t go on Facebook.

  • @[email protected]
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    483 months ago

    My dad on 2 separate and unrelated occasions.

    Him. Almost recovered from my surgery

    Me. Wtf what surgery.

    Him. I put it on Facebook

  • Transporter Room 3
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    483 months ago

    I found out my mother had HEART SURGERY two weeks ago when my sister sent a weird “she’s out of the operating room and I recovery” message, I thought she meant her mother in law and was informing my parents on the family group text, since my parents know her a lot better than I do.

    Nope. It was my own mother, and nobody told me about a surgery they all knew about 6 months in advance.

      • Transporter Room 3
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        73 months ago

        Honestly I have no idea.

        And its not just my immediate family either.

        When my grandfather died, nobody in my family had been told he was having anything done until that morning, so we scrambled to visit him. There wasn’t any huge problem, but any time someone in their 70s is in the hospital, especially for a surgery, it’s cause for concern.

        And its a good thing we did because he bled out during the surgery, which was supposed to be a minor surgery in his lower abdomen.

  • @[email protected]
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    313 months ago

    My Mother recently went on a trip. During fathers day I’m talking to my Grandma and she asks if I was told that my mom fell on the escalator and hurt her hip. Not bad, just sore. I say no and my grandma seems really surprised that I was not told this. Later that same day I’m talking to my mom and she asks if anyone told me that my grandma broke a rib last week. No, grandma never mentioned this! Apparently I can only get my family’s health updates second hand.

    • @Worx
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      63 months ago

      Your fifth cousin twice removed just phoned up and said she was in a nasty car accident a couple of days ago – I just thought you should know.

  • @[email protected]
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    303 months ago

    I was studying abroad so I came home after a year found out my father had a stroke and no one told me.

    My sister causally told me couple weeks back that my uncle died 6 months ago.

  • @[email protected]
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    293 months ago

    “The family has COVID”
    “Oh, okay”
    2 days later
    Sister sends me a screenshot of a Facebook post in which my mother’s in the hospital

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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      213 months ago

      Because if there’s anywhere you should share your private medical issues, it’s on a for-profit website that tracks and sells literally everything you do online, and won’t even show it to the people who you wanted to share it with.

      Facebook Nowadays: “Oh, you want to see what your friends are up to? Too fucking bad. Here’s a thousand pictures of Sylvester Stalone, and 900 ads.”

  • @[email protected]
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    273 months ago

    My sister, didn’t visit for a few years then told family she was going to visit for Christmas, okay. She arrives with unexpected company, her boyfriend, she says. Family never heard about him. 1 month later she visits and goes, oh yeah, “I am expecting in 5 months”. 2 months later she goes, oh yeah “I got married last week”.

    She doesn’t understand why dad was so upset…

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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      93 months ago

      I know people that still send me messages on Facebook even though I’ve told them that I don’t have the messenger, will never have the messenger, don’t have the Facebook app, will never have the app, and can’t check the website messages from my mobile browser. I visit Facebook on a desktop like once every 3 months. So, I have no clue why they still send me messages there. Have fun waiting for a response, my guy.

    • @[email protected]
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      3 months ago

      I got my family off messenger for family chat, onto signal.

      My partner never had Facebook, so I got lots of messages “tell Sam blah blah”

      I told them via group sms, “hey guys, I deleted Facebook, so if you want us it’s phone, SMS, or signal”

      So now when they want to tell Sam something, they can @ Sam

  • Lord Wiggle
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    193 months ago

    My parents do this all the time. “Yeah, we just came back from the funeral, it was beautiful.” So apparently my aunt died. “Oh yeah, we thought it wouldn’t interest you”.

    At the same time, they call me to tell me “So, Henry had to go to the hospital, he’s in a bad state. We though you’d want to know.” So apparently someone from their neighborhood who I never met or heard of has some bad health.