“Honestly? You look so naturally beautiful I couldn’t begin to guess. But if I had to, I’d say your most captivating thing about you is your eyes. Are they the real deal or someone fashion them from starlight?”
“The left one?”
“Oooh, I don’t know. Maaaaybeee your lips, because I can’t stop looking at them. But if you did, then your doctor is really good.”
Deliver it light and kind of flirty and she’s not thinking about whatever trap that question is, she’s thinking about how you just told her you want to kiss her.
If it’s for any other reason - making sure an insecurity is unknown, wanting to springboard into a conversation, wanting to see how you react if she baits you into saying something dumb, or even having her own flirty line to deliver about it - she’ll probably get to it. Assuming you haven’t wooed her into a voracious make out session.
“They must have clipped off your wings, because you look like an angel.”
vomits
Did it hurt, when they clipped your wings and you took 1000d6 falling damage, m’lady?
“Or like some sort of succubus devil thing, I dunno.”
Horn removal and chopped off a spiky tail lol
“Speaking of which…did it hurt when you broke through the Earth’s crust while ascending from hell?”
Hey, I’ll take any action I can get.
I was gonna finish with “…an ANGEL OF DEATH!!!” and start to air guitar. If she does the intro scream, she’s a keeper.
" Well, I know it isnt all that stuff that clearly needs work"
Do the following:
First, say something along the lines of: “That is very difficult. On the one hand, you are so astonishingly beautiful that all features of you could be made by a master craftsman. On the other hand, as I am a person of faith, you could also be just God’s most perfect creation.
Either way, would you excuse me a second while I go to refresh in the bathroom?”Then you sneak out of the bathroom window because by the glorious lord Satan himself, you do not want to be in a relationship with someone who insists you do something after you refuse
“that is very difficult, one the one hand you are so astonishingly beautiful that all features of you could be made by a master craftsmanship, on the other hand, as I am a person of faith, you could also be just God’s most perfect creation.
Either way, would you excuse me a second while I go to refresh in the bathroom?”
Better answer: Don’t put up with toxic games
I’d say something dumb like, “Why would you only have work done on one breast, that’s weird.” Though I guess there’s situations with breast cancer and mastectomies and such, but plastic surgery on boobs would be my immediate first guess, not even considering what else might be done.
The correct answer is: “I can’t tell, you are naturally beautiful”
My SO doesn’t buy it, but I noticed when I stopped giving those kinds of compliments, they got really mad.
I’m pretty sure the correct answer is (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻)
And storm off
Insist, not to pick something then. You can easily explain that it’s a lose-lose: either something is wrong with a natural body part or they didn’t do a good job. And both of you feel bad afterwards.
she clearly wants you to compliment her natural features, play along citizen.
I failed this test. It feels like a mind game and i don’t play them.
How would anyone be supposed to know that?
Also isn’t asking for compliments generally a bad thing?
Which is why she isn’t directly asking for them.
Sounds like trouble is they ever get into a relationship.
“Your nose is your cutest feature, that’s why I chose it” is the correct response
“Not like those ugly-ass ears. They really screwed those up, huh?”
Did you fall from heaven? Because your face is really fucked up.
(this one is so stupid and obviously inappropriate that I laugh each time I imagine someone saying it)
My autistic ass would be like “Nope no clue sorry, whatever it was, they a good surgeon 👍”
Neurotypical here - that’s the correct response.
Unsure of neuro-typicalness, but I’d go with this one as well.
ADHD here, it’s one of two. The other is to guess bottom surgery/sex reassignment to teach her what sort of prizes she can expect from playing stupid games. Yeah you’re burning that bridge, but that’s a bridge worth burning
Tell her that her nose looks too perfect, problem solved
Exactly. They fumbled hard. “It has to be your ____, there’s no way it turned out that good naturally.”
Labia reduction
“You seemed like a person who would have a wizard’s sleeve situation down there.”
“Wtf it was my ears”
“So is the situation down there not fixed or what do you mean?”
