Hear me out. First, I know sex isn’t everything and I know that hooking up and getting laid isn’t going to solve deeper needs and insecurities that I am working on.
That said, I’m also getting out of a long and bad relationship that has left me feeling like I missed so many experiences and opportunities in what ultimately were the final years of my 20s.
I never really properly figured out dating or hooking up. Even though it’s not literally true, I feel like the only person I’ve been with is someone where we skipped straight to “serious long term relationship” which not only contributed to why we didn’t work out, but also kind of stunted my development when it comes to romance and sex.
So now I’m trying to take a step back and just kind of loosen up and have fun in a way I feel I never have before. I do want to develop real connections and long term relationships, but I also want a bit of time away from that first.
Only problem is, I have no clue how and I do feel just a bit old for it. I’m on Tinder and frankly it just feels like nobody is interested.
Bars. Clubs. Places where people who are not necessarily looking for a long-term answer.
Get off of Internet dating, you are buried there in a sea of horny men worse than a US Navy destroyer being sunk in the Pacific theater, you won’t stand out
simple:
- be attractive
- dont be unattractive
- having disposable income helps too
I don’t mean to be critical when I’m literally asking for help (though your comment is not helpful at all), but I feel like this meme is just totally fueled by Internet brain.
- I kind of think I qualify on all three, certainly the last two
- even if you do though, presumably you still have to do something
- last, there are more people who are not 8-10s than there are who are. Presumably they flirt, date, and have sex too right? At some level shouldn’t this just mean there are more people “in your league”?
no, being critical is fine.
actual advice then? find a cougar bar - older women who only visit so they can pick up younger men with the sole purpose of one night stands. cougars are less demanding, arent as picky, and really only want one thing - coincidentally, the same thing you want.
good luck!
0ne of my friends used to sleep around a lot. He’s not bad looking, but he said the trick to having more one night stands is that most people still in the bar after 2am when it’s gone quiet are hoping for sex, and women who are less attractive are more willing sexual partners. That was before dating apps really took off, because he settled down a while ago. Your milage may vary, but he’s the only one of my friends who really had a man slut phase and that’s what he said about it.
Are you 8+/10? If yes, hop on the apps. You’ll have your phase.
You’re not? I’m hoping your social skills are good, because otherwise it’s not very realistic for you to “have a slut phase”.
I’m assuming this is not a troll post.
Realistically, aren’t most people not 8+/10s by definition? Don’t they flirt, date, and hookup too?
Which is why most men do not have a “slut phase”
That really makes no sense. If you’re a 5 there are statistically way more people “in your league” than if you’re a 10.
Indeed. But there’s no guarantee that people who are fives are looking for similar people who are relative fives on a scale of appearance.
It is just really not the case that only the most attractive people have sex. The majority of sex - casual and otherwise - is had between people who are average looking.
Of course average people have sex. My point was that above-average people have a lot more sex
Half of all people are above average. I just don’t think this is the death sentence people on the Internet say it is.
