The fucking Muppets aren’t entertaining. At all. Not even a tiny little bit. First of all, who is their intended audience, even? Not kids, really, because they contain a bunch of references to stuff that kids really won’t get. Kids don’t really know how a rock drummer is supposed to behave. They won’t find Kermit and Miss Piggy’s couple dynamics relatable. They don’t understand that Fozzie Bear is supposed to be an old-fashioned standup comedian. It’s all a bunch of weird cultural callouts, from a very specific 1950s-through-1970s American time period. Even kids in the mid-1970s didn’t actually understand what they were seeing.

But, on the other hand, none of that shit is appealing to adults. At least, it shouldn’t be. The pig woman is low-key horny all the time, but isn’t being satisfied by the naked frog guy? That’s funny to you? Those old guys are trolling everyone from the fake balcony seats, but they can’t ever actually put together an actual joke? You can’t understand what either the chef or the scientist guy is saying?

STOP ME IF I GET TO SOMETHING THAT’S ACTUALLY FUNNY, RIGHT?

It just isn’t fucking funny. Any of it. And it’s really not cute. It’s allllll just fucking stupid, from start to finish.

I don’t get what the appeal was ever supposed to be, and I’m pretty sure it only got popular because a large number of people were simultaneously afraid that they were missing the joke, missing references, missing SOMETHING, and they didn’t want to be seen as stupid, soooooo they agreed with the small number of shitheads, who were like “BRILLIANT! THIS IS GOING TO CHANGE PUPPETRY FOREVER!”

Puppetry is a shit-tier medium, anyway. Yeah, I said it. Real controversy I’m kicking up, huh? Yeah, you all KNOW puppetry sucks. It originated during the Classical and Medieval periods, when people desperately needed entertainment, but couldn’t stand to look at the faces of the other villagers for one more second, even if they’d written a play, and it was the only thing you could go and see, other than your walls.

The only SENSIBLE reason that the fucking Muppets are actually beloved is that people in the English-speaking world all watched Sesame Street, and that show is tangentially associated with the Muppets. And that’s fine. But it’s actually a kids’ show. And it’s not really the same exact thing as the Muppets. The two franchises are related, but Sesame Street actually teaches kids the alphabet and shit.

And fuck Jim Henson, himself. He was just some guy with a beard and a MASSIVE EGO. You’d have to have a giant fucking ego to shit out that kind of nonsense, with such utter confidence. If only he’d been able to actually write comedy or drama, he probably WOULD have been a great man. But he couldn’t, so he wasn’t. He was just a weirdo with a puppet fixation, who had a knack for jamming his foot into Hollywood’s door, before anyone could close it on him. More’s the pity.

Stop lionizing a deeply and pathetically unfunny, uninteresting man, just because he died tragically. Lots of people die tragically. It doesn’t retroactively give them talent.

EDIT: hmmmmmm, it seems as if my UNPOPULAR OPINION, which I posted in the place for UNPOPULAR OPINIONS is immediately proving to be pretty UNPOPULAR. Please keep this in mind, when you’re getting ready to type your personal attacks.

  • @[email protected]
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    136 months ago

    Aight, lemme see if’n I can’t match the goofy ass rant energy here…

    Motherfucker, we had lawn darts… 6" long finned metal spikes that you threw across the yard at a hula hoop. Think Cornhole, but with giant stabby things… We shot each other with bb guns, on fucking purpose… You know why?

    Because TV had maybe ten channels. VCRs didn’t even exist. If you wanted to watch a movie, you dug through 15 pages of schedules in a little comic book looking deal that came in the Sunday paper (and if you didn’t get a Sunday paper, well fuck you…) looking to see if it was gonna show that week and when, and hopefully you were able to watch TV whenever the hell it was gonna be on, which never once fucking happened to anybody ever

    We had cartoons on Saturday morning until a bunch of singing Mexican kids came on, and then it was whatever was on the damned thing. You got days of our lives, Dallas, some fucking nutjob recruiting for shit like jonestown (there was always one on one of the channels), mr ed, or the fucking muppets… We watched the fucking muppets because it wasn’t in fucking black and white, didn’t have a talking horse or a bunch of goofy ass Germans making bad jokes, and we really didn’t give a fuck who shot JR because we didn’t even know who the fuck he was…

    Knight Rider and A Team were “prime time”, wich didn’t mean it was what everybody was streaming, it meant it showed in the hours betweern school/work and bedtime when people had time to watch. There was exactly ZERO ability to make anything appear on that fucking TV except whatever 10 options you had at any given time, until the Atari came out.

    The Muppets were our Biden. Not great by any metric whatsoever, but the alternatives were all crap, so it was what we went with and we all enjoyed the lack of shitshow alternatives…

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      36 months ago

      Three things. Four really, but I’m leaving the fourth un-numbered:

      1. You make a bunch of excellent points, unironically.

      2. I will take the “match the goofy ass rant energy” remark on the chin. Hands up, dead to rights, you got me on that one.

      3. Most importantly, it’s refreshing to see anyone of your generation unreservedly admitting that all sane people have to choose Biden…or else, well, you’re not actually sane.

      On the other hand, your generation also voted for Ronald Reagan. If you’re one of those voters, you can eat my Millennial ass. I know ass-eating is more of a Gen-Z thing, but I’m young at heart.

      • @[email protected]
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        16 months ago

        Important to note, that had people never tried trickle-down economics, then we wouldn’t have data telling us about its effects. This is kinda just how the “march of history” works, its how the data that can be used to fill textbooks gets generated in the first place.

        It’s like wishing a lab experiment had never been done just because it resulted in disproving something. It’s good that it disproved something, that’s helpful.

        • @ChillDude69OP
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          36 months ago

          If we aren’t both in a concentration camp in five years, I’ll continue to agree with this comment. If we are, well, it doesn’t really matter.

  • southsamurai
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    96 months ago

    Nah, I think what you’re running into isn’t so much your basic opinion, it’s the venom you direct at it all, and at people that have a different opinion (and once you said “shouldn’t be” about adults liking it, you included your audience as a target of that venom whether that’s what you intended or not).

    See, people seem to think that “unpopular opinion” C/s or r/s are for them to come along and rant and insult things/people.

    That’s really not the point. As a matter of fact, it defeats the point because one you start ranting, you aren’t presenting an opinion, you’re just being “loud”, and often obnoxious as well. So your opinion ceases to matter, and your behavior becomes the issue.

    Seriously, there’s a ton of discussion possible about Henson, puppetry in general, the Muppets in specific, and how those things work for people that enjoy them (and fail to work for those that don’t). But your post isn’t unpopular because you don’t like Muppets, puppets, or Henson. The post is unpopular because it makes you look like an asshole.

    Did you intend it to be a funny rant? If so, I gotta say that you need to work on your material. Comedy can be the hardest thing to write, and doing a good rant that’s funny is much harder than regular jokes. This post? It’s like that drunk uncle bitching about a political issue at Christmas. Nobody is entertained, and any laughter is at the drunk asshole, not what they’re saying.

  • @[email protected]
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    6 months ago

    It’s for kids. Kids don’t need to know the references for them to enjoy it. I loved Fozzie as a kid because he was crazy, I didn’t give a shit what he was “based on”

    You’re so mad that media for children isn’t funny to you lol

    You also clearly don’t know shit about Jim Henson but you’re going off about his ego…?

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      6 months ago

      Please remember what community I posted this on. I am well aware that this is an UNPOPULAR OPINION.

      So your knee-jerk rage was, like, already unlikely to make me change my opinion.

        • @ChillDude69OP
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          -36 months ago

          Ehhh, I guess. I just think it’s weird how much of a nerve I hit, hating on the Muppets. I figured this would be a genuinely unpopular opinion, but it’s like I printed out a picture of Betty White and took a shit on it. over here.

  • blargerer
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    96 months ago

    In response to your edit; their is a difference between having an unpopular opinion, and being and asshole about it. Don’t be shocked when people are an asshole back.

  • snooggums
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    76 months ago

    This reads like someone who likes the Muppets trying to pretend to not like the Muppets in a 4chan style rant.

    The pig woman is low-key horny all the time, but isn’t being satisfied by the naked frog guy? That’s funny to you?

    As someone who loves the Muppets, this line is spot on.

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      6 months ago

      I actually do hate the Muppets, but I was also exaggerating the degree of my hate, because it’s appropriate for this community. It’s good to see some of the denizens here are aware of the vibe the community is supposed to have.

      As opposed to some of these jokers, who are very seriously out for my blood, apparently.

  • nyahlathotep
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    76 months ago

    I haven’t downvoted you, but I think people that have did so less because your opinion is unpopular, and more just that you come across as such an asshole.

      • Masterblaster
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        -26 months ago

        i mostly disagree, but your rant was so well crafted that i upvoted it.

        • be_excellent_to_each_other
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          6 months ago

          Yeah, based on the entirety of the comment chain, upvoted because it fits the sub, then blocked because this is quite a lot of vitriol to bring to some cheerful puppets, it completely ignores how groundbreaking Sesame Street was in some ways, and OP literally shits on an entire medium (puppetry) which they’ve clearly not considered in enough depth to do so.

          OP has a valid opinion based on an entirely superficial view of everything they are ranting against. They are welcome to such an opinion, but I find it unlikely I’ll miss their contribution to other discussions.

          Edit - I’ll leave this because it’s tangentially relevant, and one of ERB’s best (IMO). https://youtu.be/PXBJIZ1NXFU

  • @[email protected]
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    66 months ago

    EDIT: hmmmmmm, it seems as if my UNPOPULAR OPINION, which I posted in the place for UNPOPULAR OPINIONS is immediately proving to be pretty UNPOPULAR. Please keep this in mind, when you’re getting ready to type your personal attacks.

    I wonder if it’s your opinion that’s causing the attacks or the expression of it…? (Hint: it’s the latter.)

    You don’t like the Muppets. We get it. Great. Nobody is expected to like everything by anybody who’s sane. For example I can’t fucking stand Doctor Who. I hated it as a child and I hate it more as an adult. I also hated Star Trek: The Next Generation onward in the Trek canon … except I kinda liked Enterprise. (Not loved. Kinda liked.)

    But…

    You see how I expressed that I can’t stand these shows? Notice how I didn’t at any point say that people who liked them are my inferiors for it? Let’s take a look at your performance now:

    …none of that shit is appealing to adults. At least, it shouldn’t be.

    Ooh! Strike one! Expressing BadWrongFun™. Right there you’ve got the reason your “opinion” is getting personal attacks. YOU FUCKING STARTED IT!

    …a large number of people were simultaneously afraid that they were missing the joke, missing references, missing SOMETHING, and they didn’t want to be seen as stupid, soooooo they agreed with the small number of shitheads, who were like “BRILLIANT! THIS IS GOING TO CHANGE PUPPETRY FOREVER!”

    YOU didn’t get it so anybody who likes it must be doing it for fake reasons. After all they can’t possibly like something you don’t! It must be faked! (Or shitheads.)

    Yeah, I wonder why you’re getting personal attacks?

    The only SENSIBLE reason that the fucking Muppets are actually beloved is that people in the English-speaking world all watched Sesame Street…

    And more insulting reasons for people liking something you don’t. Yeah, there’s absolutely no reason why anybody would reach for personal attacks after your expression of your opinion.

    Stop lionizing a deeply and pathetically unfunny, uninteresting man, just because he died tragically.

    Except of course he was beloved long before he died. So not only do you suck at not being an offensive, yet somehow whiny, twat, you also have no clue how “time” works.

    So, here’s a thought: if you’re going to break out the flamethrowers, don’t be whining when people toss fire back at you. Or maybe, just maybe, you could try expressing the opinion you have without the insulting takes on those who disagree with it, without ascribing motive with no evidence (because “proof by lack of imagination” is actually a logical fallacy), and with at least some hint displayed of knowing what “time” is and how it works.

  • @[email protected]
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    56 months ago

    It’s for kids. The references and any other things that would fly over kids’ heads were put there so adults watching with their children wouldn’t be bored out of their minds. It was something they could relate to, and even if it wasn’t intended for them they could still at least get some kind of entertainment out of it.

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      -56 months ago

      even if it wasn’t intended for them they could still at least get some kind of entertainment out of it.

      Can they, though?

      The whole “we put references into the kids’ media for the adults” thing is almost always a complete waste of time. Because the references are almost always just…in there. Without any actual jokes.

      I hate Shrek for the same reason. I’m sitting there, the whole time, just going “yes. I do remember that the Piña Colada Song exists. Soooooo…are we going to actually make a joke about it? No? We’re just referring to it? Okay, well then I won’t be entertained. I’d say thanks for trying, but you didn’t actually try.”

  • [email protected]
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    46 months ago

    EDIT: hmmmmmm, it seems as if my UNPOPULAR OPINION, which I posted in the place for UNPOPULAR OPINIONS is immediately proving to be pretty UNPOPULAR. Please keep this in mind, when you’re getting ready to type your personal attacks.

    I’m not of a fan of the Muppets, that’s not even an unpopular opinion.
    I’m certainly not a fan of the amount of energy with which you hate the Muppets, which, also is probably not an unpopular opinion.
    I’m not attacking you, just saying the vibe of this thread reflects the vibe of your post…
    Don’t be too surprised that people scream back at you when you scream at them.
    Shrug.

  • @[email protected]
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    6 months ago

    I’m not going to vote on this, but I will say this feels more like an attack (based solely on language used) than an unpopular opinion to drum up discussion and conversation. While you are valid in having your option heard I’m not sure you’ll get a lot of people on your side based on this.

    That aside, I can understand having characters that are based on a caricature of a profession or personality, not being something you like, but that is part of how comedy and story telling works, you need to get people invested by trying to tell a story. Are the characters deep wells of emotional storytelling and emotion, some are, but not all. I won’t change your mind, but I feel like taking a moment to understand what the Henson company is trying to vs the perceived hate over its basic nature might help a bit in giving you a bit more of a nuanced opinion.

    Edits: for gammer and clairity

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      6 months ago

      Your point would be valid, IF THE MUPPETS MOVIES AND SHOWS EVER DID ACTUALLY TELL A STORY, EITHER.

      Buuuuuut, no. They totally don’t.

      The stories in all the Muppet franchise media are all just, like “we’re going to New York or something.” And that’s it. No deep and attention-grabbing storylines to make up for the lackluster, archetypal characters.

      I’d also like to reiterate that this could ALL be wiped away, if only there were any FUNNY JOKES in the entire franchise. But that cupboard is utterly and entirely bare. That might be the real root of my annoyance. It’s on the same level as “The Big Bang Theory.” It has the rhythm and the trappings of comedy, with literally and absolutely no actual humor, of any kind.

      Actual humor is replaced with “HURRR DUUURRRR, PUPPETS ARE SILLY.” That’s not a valid substitution.

  • FoundTheVegan
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    6 months ago

    I mostly agree about the Muppets, I don’t really see the appeal and have never found any of their media all thay interesting.

    HOWEVER

    The Christmas Carol is the one exception, I don’t like it because it’s Muppets, I like it for the beautiful music and honestly heartwarming storytelling. Best adaptation by far and it’s a Christmas tradition now.

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      26 months ago

      I will fully give you that one. It’s been years and years since I’ve seen it, but I remember the Christmas Carol one being actually super legit.

      • Pepsi
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        16 months ago

        Looks like you’re the target audience then, dude.

    • @ChillDude69OP
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      26 months ago

      Yeah. It is. In retrospect, I think my name was sorta aspirational, ya know?

  • TheMongoose
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    36 months ago

    Have an upvote for the unpopular opinion, but man, who hurt you? Do you need a hug?

  • Xariphon
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    36 months ago

    I agree with you on all of this. Muppets are fucking creepy.

  • @norske
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    36 months ago

    Top tier unpopular opinion. Good stuff. 10 paragraphs of hating on the muppets.