Flick my bean instead of jack my meat.
In the immediate term, probably head to the hospital. Two reasons.
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Unless I’m magically-imparted with knowledge as to the scope of this, I’ve got no idea what’s just happened to my body or whether I could keel over at any second or what. I just know that there’s been some wildly-unexpected biological change.
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Probably want to get this documented at said hospital. In our understanding of the universe, there’s nothing that permits for someone to just wake up with the other sex’s genitals. Something like this turns that understanding on its head. Are there little green men beaming humans onto flying saucers and redesigning their bodies? I’m pretty sure that there are gonna be people taking a theological take on it too: that’d probably be the first documented case of something that could reasonably be termed a miracle.
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👨: Jack off 👧: Jack off
Have a very serious (and hopefully short) conversation with the other half and put all faith in it having a positive outcome.
… I also might start pursuing ideas on how to prove there’s a trickster god or we’re in an alien experiment or in a simulation.
Then I’d test to see what it feels like for the other sex. I’ve always been curious.
See how much can fit, maybe use it as an extra pocket.
See how much can fit,
I approve of this approach
Wait wait wait, so instead of a dick I’d have a vagina, but no boobs? I’d still keep my beard and be bald? What does this mean in reproductive terms? Would I get periods now? This is terrible what the heck is going on I need medical help urgently! Did my dick disappear or just fall off? Is it still in my pants? That would be traumatic as fuck!
Finally pee out of a separate hole. Tired of just the one.
You can have two, like me
It just takes a needle and some dedication
I clarified I meant functional elsewhere ;-)
You got two holes
yeah but only one of them can jizz out pee. With a vagina, you get to choose which hole the pee comes from. Source: I read it on the internet one time
Yeah this is true. A girl I used to work with told me about it. You can pee out of the pee hole, or the clitoris. Your choice.
What! Most absurd thing I heard yet.
Next thing you’ll be telling me you don’t give birth out of your cloaca 🙄🙄
actually women poop out the baby through their butthole. That’s why you’re always hearing about pooping the bed while giving birth. There’s no way to separate the baby from the poop until its outside the rectum. idk if this is true. I thought women didn’t have buttholes.
Everybody has a butthole; how do you think we breathe when we lie on our stomachs?
Not in my penis. Not functional anyway
Is it a full set of genitals, or random? Am I going to wake up with a single tit (or no tits, just a bag), or the full set?
Do I have reason to believe its permanent?
If temporary and not just a single tit, definitely call in sick and just… Explore for the day.
If it seems permanent (again, assuming its not just a single tit, which I would just get removed), guess I am buying myself a new wardrobe now.
Tits aren’t genitals.
Make a video of me wanking enthusiastically for my fiancée
I know that she’d love it!
Show my partner I guess.
Waow
Cry. I love being a lady, and absolutely love having the female equipment.
Pee standing up, then go back to bed to hope it changes back.
Roll over and go back to sleep.
Panic!!!
IDK celebrate
Easy peasy lemon squeeze! Take only necessary things and money, vanish and start a new life a woman.