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I was always admiring (and a bit envious of) pros handling dough with complete confidence, then one day I realized it is literally the way you have to handle the dough if you don’t want it to stick everywhere.
Makes sense though if you really think about it… just remember those “pool full of custard” videos. Starch and water mixtures are essentially non-newtonian fluids.
That’s a cake batter and certain bread thing. Cookies cannot sense fear. Pie Crusts can sense uncertainty and take advantage of it.
I tell Ms. bunnys that the reason I can’t bake is because I’m such a good cook and the reason she can’t cook is because she’s such a good baker.
Did you forget about baked beans? They don’t smell your fear, but others may fear your smell. Checkmate beanthesists.
Mmm
Uh, people?
Have you ever met a baker that was angry?
That’s why.
Yes, I once met one. But maybe he was angry because I was drunk and woke him up in the middle of the night (for me it was middle of the night, for him it was two hours before he had to get up) and asked for breadrolls.
Testing your fate, there.
I’ve never understood this. It’s pretty easy to make some decent bread just by feel. I never measure, all you need is the right moisture to flour content.
But now after writing this maybe I just don’t have fear…
The three levels of bread baking:
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I make this bread the same way every time and it comes out great!
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I don’t think I got a good crumb on this one. Maybe I overproofed? I really need a longer autolyze. I should really get a proofing drawer. Maybe I should start using the tangzhong method. Am I scoring too deep?
-
I make this bread the same way every time and it comes out great!
I’m currently at :
- huh, I didn’t know you could make bricks with flour
-
Yes once you get the hang of it after a few loaves it’s so easy. I make bread all the time, and so much cheaper too.
Every time I have to get a homemade pizza off of the peel and onto my baking steel i repeat the phrase “dough can sense fear” to myself. Cuz if you’re not confident, that thing is gonna stick to your peel or end up lopsided
Put corn meal under the dough while adding toppings.
“fear is the pie killer”
“Fear is the dough killer. Fear crumbles the crust, withers the rise, and spoils the yeast. I will let the fear knead through me. And when it has passed, I will turn the loaf to see its path. Where the fear has gone, the bread will grow. Only the loaf will remain.”
Knead it longer, it shows who’s the boss. And use more flour so it has less surface to hold on to.
Try parchment paper.
that thing is gonna stick to your peel
Use butter?
Butter in pizza dough? You want to see the world burn?
Not in the dough. Just a spread some butter or oil on the peel? 🤔
Ah mine is wooden, wouldn’t work with oil or butter.
Flour?
Baking is just chemistry. The recipes are formulas. If you measure by weight and can follow simple instructions, you can bake.
Damnit… dioxygen-diflouride again.
The degree to which baking is pure chemistry entirely depends on what you are making. Bread does not care for the laws of chemistry to the degree cakes do.
It gets more complex than that with yeast but yeah
And the yeast can sense fear.
Luckily, it can also sense anger which is why I remember every failure before I approach the dough.
I’ve been cooking for myself for a very long time and I can tell you that dough doesn’t care. It’s just about 3 things mood, moisture and temperature.
I also find you really have to watch your yeast. It might say it’s not expired, but if your dough starts to not rise very well, dump it and get a new one. Yeast is finicky.
It’s just about 3 things mood, moisture and temperature.
Nothing spoils a mood like fear!
Fear… and surprise!
Fear, surprise and ruthlessness.
A fearection is real and is…confusing.
You don’t make dough do you… :-)
